


i drive you crazy (but you always return)

by Celais



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Neighbors, F/M, Friends to Lovers, with minor hate from clarke in the beginning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-04
Updated: 2018-07-04
Packaged: 2019-06-05 08:17:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 22,238
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15166490
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Celais/pseuds/Celais
Summary: Moving away from her mother to Chicago, Clarke expects to find some peace and quiet.What she actually finds is a ridiculously attractive and noisy neighbor.AKA the Bellarke neighbors AU nobody asked for.





	i drive you crazy (but you always return)

**Author's Note:**

> Honestly I have no idea what this is, but it's literally been in my drafts since 2016. (the sad thing is i'm not even kidding). And I hate it more than life itself but I put way too much energy in it to keep it locked away on my laptop forever.
> 
> Title from Bloodsport - Raleigh Ritchie (aka one of my all time favorite OTP songs)

The first night it happened was the night Clarke moved in. After hours of dragging boxes up to the third floor, she finally had everything inside her new apartment. Deciding she deserved a hot cup of tea and some time to relax, she left the boxes and zigzagged to the kitchen to boil some water. Ten minutes later, she was nestled on her bed, a large cup of tea on the table next to her and her eyes set on _Six of Crows._

 

She was barely through the first chapter—which was everything she’d hoped for—when she heard a door slam in the apartment next to hers. With it, loud moans emerged and Clarke groaned. When the landlord said the walls were thin, she hadn’t expected them to be _this_ thin.

 

But Clarke had never been one to rain on anyone's parade—unless their parade asked for it—so she turned on some music and tried to focus on the book.

 

Which was when the bumping against the wall started.

 

Sighing, she dragged herself out of bed. As much as she hated having to get out of bed for any reason, she hated listening to her neighbor having sex even more, and this was probably going to go on for a while. 

 

She walked back into her new living room, which was basically just a pile of boxes and a couch at the moment. But she could already envision what it was going to look like once it was finished. However, before she could start decorating, she had to get rid of all the boxes. Which was one hard task. When Clarke signed up for med school in Chicago, she took everything with her. Everything. She wasn't planning on going home any time soon.

 

Which seemed like a great plan in the beginning, but right now she had no idea how she was going to pull it off. She'd never lived on her own before and as much as she hated to admit it, up until two years ago everything was basically handed to her.

 

One of the perks of having a wealthy mother. Abigail Griffin was one of the most respected and most talented surgeons in Arkadia, maybe even the whole state. That, and Clarke's grandparents were loaded. So money hadn’t exactly been a problem in her life.

 

That didn't mean everything was always rainbows and sunshine. Clarke’s relationship with her mother had always been complicated. She loved her, sure, but her mother had a tendency to plan out everything, especially Clarke’s future. Clarke had always been closer with her dad, he got her in a way Abby didn't. She spent as much time with him as she could. Which proved to be a challenge, seeing he was always working. But they always managed to find time for each other.

 

Until he died two years ago.

 

Clarke grabbed a random box and unpacked it. It was now just past midnight and she was about ready to give up and just sleep on the couch. The banging was barely audible in the living room. But the idea of having to sleep on the couch because her neighbor couldn't be bothered to keep it down aggravated her beyond measure. How was that fair?

 

It wasn't, she decided.

 

And if there was one thing Clarke Griffin was, it was stubborn. And while her conscience screamed not to fucking go there, her body was already moving and before she knew it, she was slamming a post-it note on the door, slamming her fists against the door a few extra times, in the hope it would get them to shut up, before stalking back inside her apartment and jumping in her bed.

 

When her neighbor opened the door that morning he would find a pink note stuck to the door with the note:

 

_‘Have sex all you want but kindly MOVE. YOUR. BED. further from the wall and maybe keep it down a bit so I can actually get some fucking sleep. – Your new neighbor.’_

 

*

 

That same morning Clarke went out to get some breakfast, and some much deserved coffee to get through the day. When she returned she found a small envelope on her doorstep. Frowning, Clarke opened the envelope to find a pair of earplugs and a note.

 

_'I moved the bed, but I can’t help it if my girlfriend doesn’t feel like ‘keeping it down’ so these might come in handy._

_Sincerely,_

_I’m not that bad._

__

_Ps. Welcome to the neighborhood.’_

 

Clarke rolled her eyes and went back inside.

 

At least it was something.

 

*

 

Another time it happened, was when Wells came over as a birthday surprise.

 

'Your neighbor is... eh, enthusiastic...?' Wells murmured when the moaning started. It had been quiet for a couple of weeks. In fact, she hadn’t even seen her neighbor yet. She figured he worked a lot and that that kept him busy.

 

'Try not to pay too much attention to it. That's what I do.' 

 

'This happened before?' Wells asked with a raised eyebrow.

 

'Yeah, if you haven't noticed, I'm living the good life here, Wells.' Wells chuckled.

 

'I can't believe you haven't given him a piece of your mind yet. Chicago has changed you, my friend.'

 

'Oh, I did. The first night. But then he actually listened to me so now I'm not sure how angry I can be at him for still being loud.'

 

Wells shook his head with a sarcastic sigh. 'Why can't people just be ordinary assholes.' Clarke rolled her eyes, but her lips curled up into a small smile. 'Anyway, how's school going?'

 

'Fine, I guess. Just busy. I've got a ton of stuff to do at home but I can't concentrate here. There's too much stuff, so I usually just stick around at the library but there's no good bus connection and you know how I feel about exercising.' Clarke really hated anything to do with physical exercising. 'So I never really end up doing much.'

 

'You are the worst student I've ever met.' Wells laughed. 'But you're sure this is what you want, right? Because you know your mo--'

 

'Please, Wells, don't.' Clarke interrupted. 'I like it here. I'm finally taking care of myself. I'm not going back.'

 

'You should really talk to her, though.'

 

'I've said everything I needed to say.' Wells nodded and silence fell between the two. Wells had always been a peacemaker, but there were some things that couldn't be fixed and the relationship between Clarke and Abby was one of those things. 'Speaking of, how are things back home?'

 

'They're... good, I guess. It's weird, you not being there. Dad is preparing to run again, and I feel really bad about saying this, but I hope he'll lose. He hasn't been my dad in a long time and I miss him.' Speaking of complicated relationships, Wells and Thelonious Jaha were complicated on a whole other level. Thelonious is the mayor of Arkadia and he takes that job very seriously. But he always ended up spending more time in the office than he did at home and he put a lot of pressure on his relationship with Wells. His mom passed away when Wells was born and Wells always felt like Thelonious held a grudge against him for it. But Clarke knew how much Thelonious loved Wells. He just also loved his job. And Clarke wasn't sure which came first, but to Wells it seemed like the latter was more important. 'God, I'm horrible for saying that, aren't I?'

 

'No. You're not. Seriously, Wells. You're the least awful person I know.'

 

'Well, your standards aren't very high, so…'

 

'That might be the case, but that doesn't make it less true.'

 

Wells left later that night and Clarke already missed him before he was even out the door. Things really were different now, but the one thing that she could always count on in her life was Wells. And she was thankful for it.

 

*

 

The week after Wells had left Clarke woke up to someone knocking on her door. She glanced at her clock, which read 7:30 AM and she groaned. Whoever it was better had a damn good reason or he or she was going to lose its head. Nobody woke Clarke Griffin up on her free day before 10 AM.

 

She rolled out of bed and stumbled through her apartment, slowly wiping the sleep from her eyes. She opened the door to find a stranger. A very _hot_ stranger. Dark curls, dark eyes, freckles and _shit_. Dimples.

 

'Hi?' She asked, her voice rough.

 

The handsome stranger quickly glanced around before rubbing the back of his neck. 'Hi, um, I'm your neighbor? The loud one?' Clarke frowned.

 

'What do you want?'

 

'Look, I need your help.' Clarke snorted as she crossed her arms.

 

'Why would I help you? All you've done is interrupt my sleep.'

 

'Look, Princess, I'm sure I can do something for you in return, but I just really need your help getting this girl out of my apartment.' Clarke scoffed. 'Seriously, I just broke up with my girlfriend and I was on the rebound and now she doesn't want to leave. Can you just help me, please?'

 

'Fine.' Clarke said reluctantly. 'Get back into your apartment, I'll be there in a sec. Leave the door open.'

 

He shot her an appreciative smile. Clarke closed the door and quickly changed out of her PJ's and into something more presentable. She brushed her hair and went to his apartment, 320, as silently as she could.

 

She knocked once before opening the door. 'Baby?' She called out into the void. She knew which direction the bedroom was, obviously. She also heard rummaging coming from that direction. 320 appeared out of nowhere.

 

'Babe... wh-what are you doing here?' Damn, he was a good actor. She walked towards him, a smile playing on her lips.

 

'I thought we could get some breakfast. We haven't gone out together in forever. I miss you.'

 

'Yeah, um, I'm not really feeling too well and I do-' He was in the middle of his excuse when the toilet flushed and a half naked brunette walked out of the bathroom. She shot daggers in Clarke's direction. 

 

'Who are you?' She asked. Clarke raised her eyebrows and crossed her arms. That girl had some nerve. 

 

'I'm his _fiancée_ , who the hell are you?!' Then she turned her attention back to 320. 'Who is she? And _please_ don't say your sister because I saw your sister's Facebook profile and she did _not_ look like that.'

 

'Please, baby, it's not what it looks like.'

 

'Great, you're cheating on me. Fan-fucking-tastic.’ Clarke flailed her arms around in emphasis. ‘You know your father warned me about you! He said you'd end up being a dick but I didn't believe him. Well, I guess the joke's on me.' Clarke yelled at him. The brunette glanced between the two, feeling rather awkward as she slowly backed away. Clarke turned around in an attempt to walk away from him when 320 grabbed her hand. Not thinking twice, Clarke swirled around and her hand connected with his cheek. Hard. That was going to hurt.

 

'Do not touch me, you asshole.' She spat. 'I hope you caught an STD from that bitch.' She sprinted out of his apartment, quickly yelling 'I'm keeping the ring.' over her shoulder and went back into her own apartment, trying her best to listen to what was happening on the other side of the wall.

 

She didn't catch much, they were speaking rather quietly but she heard the door shut not a few minutes later, which she took as good news. Shortly after that, a knock appeared on her door.

 

She opened it with a triumphant smile on her face. 'You're welcome.' She said to 320.

Which was when she saw the red hand mark on his cheek. 'Shit, I'm sorry, I got a little carried away.'

 

'It's okay. I just came by to thank you.' He smiled at her, flashing his dimples and Clarke almost swooned. She really had to get laid.

 

'It was more fun than I thought it would be.' She smiled.

 

'You're just saying that because you got to slap me.' That earned a laugh from Clarke. 'Anyway, I'm Bellamy. And I guess I'll hear from you when you need that favor.' 

 

'I guess you will.' 

 

*

 

Clarke didn't see Bellamy again until midway November. He didn't have any more girls over, or if he did, he was being quiet about it. Which Clarke greatly appreciated. He had left her a note with his number. 'In case you need that favor when I'm not around.'

 

They did fall into a habit of leaving each other stupid notes. Bellamy left one when Clarke used her kitchen for the first time. She hated how time-consuming cooking was. She loved cooking, and more importantly _food_ , but with settling in and school she never really found the time. But she loved the food and she figured she'd had enough takeout and pasta. Bellamy left a note that the smell of the food hung in his apartment for at least two days, and that she'd better invite him next time. Later, Clarke sent him a note when his mail was delivered at her place instead of his. In all honesty, she enjoyed coming home to a yellow post-it stuck to her door. 

 

She didn't really know much about Bellamy, though. All she knew was that he worked a lot of hours and that he liked to read about Greek mythology. 

 

Premed  was really busy. It was kicking Clarke's ass, and the more time she spent studying, the more dull it became.

 

It was a Friday night when she decided she was done for the night and that she deserved to have some fun. She closed all her books, changed into a simple black dress that perfectly accentuated her breasts, pulled her hair into a ponytail and went on her way.

 

The cold wind blew through her hair and Clarke closed her eyes to breathe it in. She loved the winter. She loved all the seasons, but there was something about winter that she just loved more than the others. She set foot into the first bar she could find. 'Dropship' or something of the sort. She wasn't really interested in the name, so long as there was booze and good music.

 

The bartender was a Latina brunette, who gave her a beer on the house. 'You look like you can use one.' she had said. She was right.

 

There weren't a lot of cute guys around, so she mostly stuck to the bar- the closest to the alcohol. The brunette—Raven, kept her company. She was fun. And she didn’t beat around the bush, something Clarke loved. She wasn't sure if it were people in the city in general, or just Raven, but she really appreciated people who just put things as they were. It was a nice change from people in Arkadia, who were too afraid to tell her what they were thinking.

 

A few guys tried to hit on her, but they weren’t really Clarke’s type. Too big an ego. So with very little effort, she managed to shrug them off. Raven enjoyed it thoroughly. When the clock struck 2 AM Clarke called it a night. Raven had to work until four. She invited Clarke to stick around for a little longer, but Clarke felt like she needed to go home. She had a long weekend ahead of her.

 

There was only one flaw in her 'fuck school I'm going out'-plan, Clarke soon came to realize as she was walking home.

 

She was terrified of the city.

 

In Arkadia she knew most people and almost everyone knew her, or knew _of_ her because she was a Griffin. She didn’t have that many friends in the city yet.

 

But Clarke, stubborn as she was, refused to go back to the bar and tell Raven she changed her mind.  So she kept walking. 

 

She was probably halfway home when she felt like she was being followed.

 

She knew she was probably just being paranoid, but she couldn't shake the feeling. Grabbing her phone, she scrolled through her contact list. She only had three people to call, one of which was probably drunk and of no use right now, the second was probably asleep and the third was Bellamy. But he would probably be asleep right now as well and she refused to use her favor on this.

 

She put her phone back into her purse and kept walking, her hand never leaving the purse. She simply kept it wrapped around the bottle of pepper spray she was always carrying around.

 

Every sound seemed to scare her, which was ridiculous because there were sounds literally everywhere. It was a Friday night in the city for God's sake. But some things took some getting used to and Arkadia was no Chicago. Arkadia was a whole different story. It was a small city, but it wasn't as alive as Chicago. 

 

Knowing she probably couldn't shake it, she grabbed her phone again to call Bellamy. It rung.

 

Once.

 

Twice.

 

'Hello?' It came from the other end. His voice was hoarse and he sounded tired. She really did just wake him. Shit. _What were you thinking?_

 

'S-Sorry wrong number.' She all but yelled before quickly hanging up again. _Smooth, Clarke. Real smooth._ She scolded herself.

 

Before she even locked the phone she force herself to dial his number again. As much as her pride meant to her, her safety (and sanity) were more important at the moment. This time it only rung once before he answered. 'Okay can I just start by saying how sorry I am for waking you? I just- I didn't really have anyone else to call but you, but yeah I'm sorry.'

 

'Princess?' Clarke rolled her eyes at the nickname.

 

'It's Clarke, actually, but yeah. Seriously, I'm really sorry for waking you.'

 

'You didn't wake me, but even if you had it's fine. What's up?'

 

'Well, I was working on some school stuff but then I was like _fuck this_ so I went out and I'm on my way back home now but I just realized I'm scared to death of walking home alone in the dark. And I don’t know anyone here aside from you. Well, you and Monty to be honest, but he’s useless,’ She rambled, ‘I mean, he’s great and all but even I could win a fight with him. So that's why I called you.' She was nervous. She hadn’t known Bellamy for that long and more importantly, she had no idea how he'd react to this.

 

'Do you want me to pick you up?' 

 

'No, please, no, that's okay. I wouldn't want to put you through all that trouble. But if you could maybe, um, talk to me until I get home?' He seemed to think about it for a second before he replied.

 

'Sure.' Clarke felt her heart skip a beat. 'I guess this is that favor I owed you then?'

 

Clarke chuckled. 'Yeah, I guess so. Thank you.'

 

'I guess I had it coming. I mean, I interrupted your sleep a bunch of times, it's only fair you do the same.' Clarke laughed.

 

‘I thought I didn't wake you?'

 

'You didn't. I was up already. I guess it's a good thing you went out, otherwise you probably wouldn't have gotten much sleep.'

 

'Dude. Seriously? I'm doing fine without hearing you brag about your sex life, thank you very much.'

 

'It's not bragging when it's true.'

 

'It is, actually, but if you're only going to talk about sex I'm gonna hang up.' 

 

'You're the one who called me, Princess.' Damn him for being right. 'Besides, there's much more to me than sex, so there's a lot we can talk about.'

 

'Oh, really? Such as?'

 

'Well, I'm a history major for one.'

 

'I figured you were a history buff. I mean you were ready to cut off the deliverers’ head because he delivered that one.. old.. book to my place instead of yours, remember?' She couldn’t remember exactly what the book was called.  

 

She heard Bellamy sigh. ‘Okay you have so much to learn. One, the book was called _the Iliad_ , and it’s Greek mythology. And two, I take offense to your mocking tone. I'll have you know that Greek mythology is the best thing to have ever happened to humanity.'

 

'I wouldn't know, so I'll take your word for it.'

 

'You're missing out, Princess. Either way, I have a lot more going on than just being amazing in the sack… something you’ll also have to take my word for.'

 

'Wow, you really do know how to romance a girl, don't you?'

 

'Are you implying I can't be romantic?'

 

'Oh, no, I wouldn't dare. I'm sure there's a real Romeo hiding in there somewhere.'

 

‘Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit, Princess.'

 

'Well, I try to cater for my audience.' She heard Bellamy chuckle on the other end of the line.

 

'Okay, that one was pretty good, I have to give you that. But seriously, I can be romantic when I want to be.'

 

'As has been proven by the recent break up with your girlfriend and the dozen one-night stands that occurred after.'

 

'Wow. Ever heard of boundaries?' He teased.

 

'Says the guy who has been interrupting his neighbor’s sleep by having _very_ loud sex.'

 

'I guess you have a point.' He laughed. 'But you have hurt my ego, so according to the rules you have to let me prove you wrong.'

 

'And what rules might that be?'

 

'Come on, Princess. It's basic Friendship 101.'

 

'I wasn't aware we were friends.'

 

'Aren't we?' She was about to say 'no', but thought the better of it. They had potential, and she wasn’t about to scare away one of the two people she knew in the city.

 

'So, how are you going to prove me wrong?' She asked as she entered her apartment building. Bellamy was better company than she had initially thought.

 

'We're going on a date.' He stated, as if it were the most normal thing in the world. Clarke choked on a laugh.

 

'I'm sorry, what?' She managed to get out.

 

'You heard me, Princess. Tonight. I'll pick you up at eight.' 

 

'And what's in it for me?'

 

'Besides the honor of spending an amazing night with me?'

 

'Yes, aside from that.'

 

'Okay we can make it interesting. How about... if I get through the night being a perfect gentleman, you have to be at my beck and call for a month.'

 

'I'm not going to be your slave, Bellamy.'

 

'No- No, wait. I didn't mean it like _that_.  I mean come on, I smelled that risotto you made last week, I'd like to get in on that action.'

 

'So you want me to cook for you?' She stepped foot on the third floor, silently walking towards her apartment door. She entered as quietly as she could, secretly not wanting Bellamy to hear so she could keep talking to him. 'Okay... What do I get if you don't make it through the night?'

 

'I'll never take one more girl back to my place. I'll go to theirs.'

 

'Wow, you're pretty confident about your case, aren't you?'

 

'Yep. Hey, did I hear you come in just now?'

 

'Yeah. Safe and sound. Thank you for keeping me company.'

 

'Not gonna lie, it was pretty fun.' She smiled as she walked into her bedroom.

 

'So I guess I'll see you at eight, huh?'

 

'See you tonight. Sweet dreams, Princess.' With that, he hung up.

 

'Good night, Bellamy.' She murmured to her bedroom wall.

 

*

 

Clarke was pretty nervous about tonight. Not in the oh-my-god-I’m-going-out-with-a-cute-guy nervous but more of a shit-what-if-I-lose-the-bet nervous. As much as she liked cooking, she loved actually eating what she cooked even more, and she really didn't feel like cooking it just to watch it disappear in Bellamy's stomach for a month.

 

She hadn't really done anything all day. Went out for some lunch, did some groceries and called Wells. He promised to drop by in a week or so. He missed her, but he couldn't find any time sooner, he was swamped with his dad and the campaign, keeping up the happy family facade.

 

Clarke was looking forward to seeing him again.

 

But right now, she had other things to worry about. Like what to wear on her 'date' with Bellamy. She had basically every cute dress she owned lying on her bed, but she couldn't make up her mind. Too bad she didn't have any girl-friends she could ask.

 

But she did have one friend she could call.

 

'Really? You called me over to help you get dressed for a date?' Hearing Monty say it out loud made it clear to Clarke how ridiculous it sounded. How ridiculous _she_ was being. She even snuck him in as fast as she could, because she wasn't sure if Bellamy was home or not and she didn't want him to see her actually try.

 

'Um... yeah?'

 

'How desperate are you?'

 

'Very.' She admitted. 

 

'And you called _me_?'

 

‘You're my only friend in the city.' Clarke knew Monty from back home in Arkadia. They went to high school together and he moved to Chicago immediately afterwards. He was a genius so he got many offers from the best schools in the country, there was no way he was going to stick around in Arkadia. Clarke ran into him on campus, thanks to her partner from her biology class, Harper. They went to lunch together, exchanged numbers and caught up with each other on everything that had happened since they had last seen each other.

 

Monty sighed. 'Fine, let's do this.'

 

*

 

As much as Monty would hate to hear it, he was useless. He really tried, though. But Monty wasn't really what one would call a good stylist. He just grabbed a random dress from the bed and told her that was the one. And then another, and then another. Until he actually freaked out as well, grabbed a beer, and started from the beginning.

 

The circle repeated itself about three times until Clarke was ready to suffocate herself with a pillow and interfered. 

 

'You know you're horrible at this right?'

 

'Yeah, well, joke's on you because you asked me to come.' Clarke chuckled. 'When this is all over, I'm introducing you to more people. Then you can call them to torture instead of me.'

 

'Sounds good.'

 

'Okay but can’t you just... I don't know, just grab a dress with your eyes closed and make it work. If this has to go on any longer I swear, I’m going to jump out of that window. Do you really want to deprive the world of me and my genius brain?'

 

'Fuck. Maybe. Don't tempt me right now, I'm very aggravated.'

 

'You're not the only one! Shit, Clarke, why do you even own this many dresses if you hate all of them?'

 

'I don't hate them, they’re just not first-date worthy.'

 

' _Oh my God_. Then _why_ don’t you buy first-date worthy dresses?!' Clarke watched Monty, who was seemingly ready to rip all the hair from his head and she burst out laughing. He soon joined in.

 

Shit, she had no idea that she’d be this desperate for her not-really-a-first-date-or-date-at-all with Bellamy.

 

'Okay, fuck this. You're right. I don't know why I'm being this stupid, it's not even a real date, for fuck's sake.' Monty's eyes nearly popped out.

 

_'What?!_ Then why did you call me?'

 

'Because it's a bet and I want to beat his ass. You know how competitive I get.'

 

'Yes, I do. I know first-hand how shitty life is at the receiving end. Jesus, that group project we did in high school? _Brutal_.' Clarke laughed. Those were some dark moments.

 

'Okay. I'm just gonna wear...' Her fingers skimmed over the six dresses she had left on her bed. 'This one.' Her fingers landed on the dress with the polka dots. She glanced at Monty who was raising an eyebrow. 'What?'

 

'Really? The polka dots?'

 

'You are the most useless friend anyone could ever ask for.'

 

'I can't be brilliant at everything. But seriously... polka dots?'

 

'I hate you.' She said as she hung the dress back in her closet.

 

'You can hate me all you want, but I just saved you from a disaster.'

 

'The night is probably going to be a disaster anyway.'

 

'But at least now it won't be because of the dress.' 

 

'I'll just wear the red one, and screw you, Monty. I can rock any dress I fucking want to.'

 

*

 

At exactly 8:00 PM a knock appeared on her door. Clarke wasn't going to admit it, but she had been waiting for that knock for almost fifteen minutes. She hurried to the door and swung it open. Her breath caught in her throat when she saw Bellamy. He wasn't wearing anything too fancy, but he looked handsome. But then again, he always did. 

 

'Wow… um... wow.' He stuttered, and Clarke felt a blush creeping up to her cheeks. 'You look beautiful.' She contemplated teasing him, because she was pretty sure this was the first compliment he ever gave her, but decided against it. 

 

'Thank you.' She said instead. 'You clean up pretty nicely too.' He smiled, flashing his dimples- _God, his dimples-_ and scratched the back of his head.

 

'I was going to buy you flowers on the way over here, but as it turns out, there aren't any flower shops between your apartment and mine.' Clarke chuckled.

 

'That's a shame.'

 

He offered her his arm. 'Let's go, shall we? I have a whole night planned for us.'

 

'Really?' Curiosity got the better of her as she linked her arm with his. 'Where are we going?'

 

'Well, you haven't been in the city for too long, as I recall, so I thought I'd take you to some of the best places I know.' 

 

She wasn't sure how to respond to that. It was a very thoughtful gesture. He could have just taken her to a movie or some random restaurant. They didn't set up any further rules to tonight other than him being a gentleman. 'Let's go, Princess.'

 

First, he took her to a Chinese restaurant across their apartment complex. Clarke couldn't believe she'd never noticed the small red neon sign that hung just above the entrance. It was very cozy, and their noodles were absolutely amazing.

 

They talked about school and back home. He asked her all sorts of things about Arkadia, about Wells ( _'He's my best friend'_ ), about her family ( _'I don't really have much family left._ '), about school ( _'Not gonna lie, it's kicking my ass.'_ ) and about her move to Chicago ( _'I don't know, I guess I just needed a change.'_ ).

 

Based on the soup and the noodles Clarke had wanted to eat a whole lot more, but Bellamy stopped her from ordering, because 'they had a lot more to do tonight'.

 

Next, he took her to an ice cream parlor, which was located a little further away from the restaurant. They ate their ice cream on their way to the new location, he told her about many other places he wanted her to know about; the Indian place on 59th, the cinema, a Greek restaurant, which was a bit too far a travel for his taste (it was a twenty minute walk), but totally worth it, a cafe a block or two from their apartment, that not only made the best coffee, but had amazing bagels as well.

 

The next location ended up being The Dropship, the bar Clarke was at last night. But instead of drinking, they went into the back where they played a game of pool. Bellamy introduced her to a few people- Nathan Miller, but everyone called him Miller, Monroe, who seemed fun but was currently too busy with Harper to really notice Clarke (they literally just started dating, Bellamy would later explain), and Wick, the owner of the bar. Clarke vaguely remembered Harper from campus. Bellamy told about his days as a bartender. He would still work here sometimes, when he didn't have anything better to do or when Wick was short staffed.

 

Clarke asked about Raven, the brunette that tended the bar last time she was here. Turns out Raven was a onetime thing, she needed some quick cash before she left town, for whatever reason. Bellamy didn't really know her so Wick ended up telling the tale to her. She was a little disappointed, because Raven had seemed nice, but there wasn't anything she could do about it and she didn't have much time to dwell over it because the next thing she knew, Bellamy was dragging her out of the bar.

 

Clarke had exchanged numbers with the bunch (they insisted she join the group chat on WhatsApp), downed one shot because Wick wouldn’t let her leave if she didn’t take it, before they went on their way again. They would head to their last destination, Bellamy had said.

 

The last location was the park, Bellamy's silent place, as he put it. Clarke refused to leave the swing she was twirling around on and Bellamy gladly stayed put on the swing next to hers.

 

'I have to give it to you, Bellamy. This was amazing.' She looked at him to find him staring into the empty park.

 

'I told you I had it in me.'

 

'I'm glad I doubted you.' He turned to her and raised his eyebrows. 'I'm serious. I might regret it a little bit over the course of next month, but this was great. I needed this.' His lip curled into a small smile as he nodded. 

 

'You are so going to regret making that bet.' She chuckled.

 

'Probably. But at least I got some food and new acquaintances out of it.'

 

'And you now know some of the best places close to home.'

 

'And that, of course.'

 

'So if you don't have any plans next week, I'm sure the guys would love to see you at the Dropship.' Clarke smiled.

 

'Wells is coming over.' He pressed his lips together and nodded. 'But I can see if he feels like going to a bar? I mean he probably has enough sorrows to drown, anyway, so... maybe.'

 

'Sounds good.'

 

A silence fell between them and Clarke twirled around on the swing, enjoying the way the stars shined in the clear night sky, the way the wind blew through the trees and through her hair and most of all the silence that made her feel like she wasn't in Chicago at all anymore. Silence was a rare thing to find in the city, so she would damn well cherish it while she could.

 

'The last person I brought here was my sister.' Bellamy suddenly broke the silence.

 

'You have a sister?'

 

'Yeah, but I'm sure she hates being related to me.' Clarke's heart ached for him.

 

'I'm sure that's not true.'

 

'I wouldn't be so sure about that.'

 

'Why?' He swallowed.

 

'She left.' Clarke was ready to respond when he continued. 'I was always really protective of O. Our mom died, our dads aren’t in the picture. We really only ever had each other. I wanted to protect her, but I just ended up driving her away.' 

 

'She brought home a boyfriend not too long ago. I didn't approve, of course. He's a biker.' He scoffed. 'Should have seen it coming, really, Octavia has been in love with bikes and bikers for as long as she's lived. First thing she ever worked for was her precious Harley Davidson. 

 

I gave him a hard time and she ended up screaming at me, that I never wanted her to be happy. I told her I just wanted what was best for her and that I would talk to her in the morning, when she'd calmed down. When I woke up she was gone.'

 

'I'm so sorry, Bellamy.' She wasn't sure what else she could say to him. 

 

'Last I heard she was in New York riding with a crew. I just wish she'd check in every once in a while, you know. Let me know she's still alive.'

 

'You know it's not your fault, right? What she did was irrational and impulsive--' 

 

'That's just who she is, though.' He interrupted. 'Impulsive as hell, and naive as well. But I'm not all innocent in this. I've done my fair share of stupid shit.'

 

'I'm sure you have, but you don’t deserve all of the blame, either. I hope you know that.'

 

'Yeah.' 

 

'You know what I said about not having any family back home?' He nodded. 'I lied. Sort of.'

 

'How so?'

 

'Technically, I do have family in Arkadia. But our situation is a little different from that of you and your sisters. My mom, she… screwed up, to put it lightly. So I left.'

 

'I'm sorry.'

 

'Yeah. Me too.' 

 

Neither of them spoke for a minute or so and Clarke thought about her first impression of Bellamy. She had misjudged him to the worst degree. Yes, he slept with way too many girls, but he was nice, honest, _fun._ And she would be proud to call him her friend.

 

'You wanna go home?' She asked, not sure exactly why, but she didn't want to bother him for any longer than she had to. She could imagine if he wanted to go home after sharing what he had just told her.

 

He paused for a second, thinking it over before replying 'No.' He sounded sure, like sitting here was something he could do all night. 'You?'

 

‘Me neither.'

 

*

 

True to her word, Clarke made Bellamy home cooked meals. After they set up some ground rules, of course. They were too busy with the actual bet to realize that they hadn't made clear what was at stake (aside from Bellamy's dignity). 

 

Clarke refused to cook more than three times a week, which she preferred to do on the weekends, because she, and Bellamy too, didn't really feel like making a big breakfast at six am in the morning or a tasty dinner at one am. 

 

So they settled on dinner on both Saturday and Sunday and breakfast on Sundays. Bellamy had to buy the groceries, because he would also be the one who would be eating it. After the first time that Clarke made him breakfast, he gave her a key and insisted it be breakfast on bed from now on, so he wouldn't have to get out of bed to open the door and then wait twenty minutes before breakfast was actually ready.

 

When Clarke brought him breakfast on bed the week after, he punched her in the throat because he thought she was a burglar. Bellamy spent the rest of the morning apologizing, asking how he could make it up to her. She didn’t know what she wanted, but after giving it some thought she made him call Wick and beg him to let Clarke tend the bar for a night. She could use the extra cash and it had looked like a fun place when Bellamy took her there. 

 

She started that Friday. It was a quiet night and Miller showed her how to mix some drinks (which was a lot harder than it looked), and for the rest of the night she was on cleaning duty. Which was a real disappointment, because she only asked for one night. But by the end of the night Wick invited her to drop by more often, and promised that if he needed extra hands he would shoot her a message ( _before_ he sent one to Bellamy).

 

The month was almost over when they made a deal that they would still eat dinner together on the weekends. However, Clarke refused to cook on her own. Bellamy would cook one night, Clarke the other. And on special occasions, they could order takeout. Truth was, Clarke loved spending time with Bellamy. Over the months they've been neighbors she got to know him better and he ended up becoming her best friend in the city.

 

Later that week, on Saturday night, Wick called that he was expecting a crowd, asking if she had some time to come over. The holidays were always the busiest. People had a lot of sorrows to drown during Christmas and New Year’s. It was that same night that Clarke stumbled into Finn Collins, who would later become her boyfriend. She was on her way home when she walked into him, quite literally. Being the true gentleman he was, he insisted on walking her home. He was nice, kind and well-balanced, and Clarke needed something well-balanced in her life for once. He had just transferred to UIC to study law.

 

Bellamy wasn't a fan of him. He mockingly called him prince charming, and insisted there must be something wrong with him- nobody who seemed perfect was that perfect. They all had a flaw that would end up being the deal breaker and Bellamy insisted on finding that flaw. Which was why Clarke refused to take Finn back to her place. She told him that she had a crazy neighbor, which was true, but she left out the part where she and her crazy neighbor were best friends.

 

School was going great. She got back the results of her midterms, which she _crushed_ , just like everyone told her she would, and things were finally quieting down a bit. She still had to study a lot, but it was going a lot better than before.

 

The fact that Clarke had a boyfriend didn't stop her from hanging out with Bellamy. In fact, they were spending more time together than ever before, and she was thoroughly enjoying it.

 

Finn seemed to notice that she had plans with someone else a lot and he made a comment once, asking her if she was ditching him for another guy. At first, she wanted to laugh at the assumption of her and Bellamy. The one date they had was a fake date. She valued their friendship a lot, and at this point it would be like dating Wells—Ridiculous.

 

'How's Prince Charming doing?' Bellamy asked her later that night when she entered his apartment with a box of pizza. He grabbed two beers and they found their usual place on the couch.

 

'Other than the fact that he thinks his girlfriend is cheating on him, he's probably fine.' When she told Finn there wasn't anyone else, she could see a little shrine of doubt in his eyes. If he didn't want to believe her, that was his problem. 

 

'Really? Who does he think you're sleeping with?'

 

'You.' She scoffed. Saying it out loud made it seem even more ridiculous. Bellamy, however, didn't seem as shocked by it as she was. 'Why are you not as surprised about this as I was?'

 

'Come on, Clarke. We spend, what, two, sometimes three nights a week together? You can't blame the guy for being jealous. I would kick my ass, if I were him.'

 

'Well, if he can't understand that we're friends, I don't really see the point. I mean, seriously? I am not even the least bit attracted to you.' Now, he did scoff.

 

'He's not here, Princess, you don't have to lie.'

 

'Oh, please. I have _never_ thought about having sex with you.' He raised an eyebrow.

 

'Really?' Maybe it had crossed her mind once or twice. Nobody could blame her for imagining what it would be like on the other side of the wall.

 

'Nope. Not once.' 

 

'I have.' 

 

'You think about having sex with everyone.'

 

'You can't possibly think I believe that it has never crossed your mind what it would be like on my side of the wall.' His voice dropped as he leaned towards her. 'Your legs around my waist...' His finger skimmed across her bare arm, forming goosebumps on the way. She knew he was just teasing her, but she felt a chill creeping up her spine, anyway. 'My hands in your hair...' Clarke held in her breath as he slowly inched closer. 'My lips... _everywhere._ ' His tongue darted out and he slowly, deliberately, licked his lips. Clarke couldn't help but look as he did. When she glanced back at his eyes, something Clarke couldn't recognize flashed through his eyes, but it quickly vanished as he backed away from her.

 

'But hey, if you really haven't thought about it.' He shrugged as he took another bite of his greasy pizza.

 

*

 

Two more weeks flew by and Clarke was spending as much time as she could with Finn, which, sometimes, interfered with her time with Bellamy. But Bellamy didn't seem to mind so much. She was really enjoying spending time with Finn. Their relationship was getting more serious and Clarke realized she was falling for him.

 

But Finn wasn't the only thing on her mind these days. The anniversary of her dad’s death was coming up, and it was eating her alive. 

 

Clarke loved her father immensely. Whereas Abby was mostly focused on the future, Jake always took the time to live in the now. He had a busy job but he always made time for her, to talk, to joke about things- just simply to spend time with her. She loved her mom as well, but somehow every conversation they had ended up about Clarke going to med school.

 

When her dad died, Clarke was devastated. Everything around her seemed to fall apart. Time was supposed to make it easier, but time had never been her friend. Last year had been incredibly hard, but she still had her mother. Clarke could share her grief with her mom. They didn't even have to talk about it, but she knew they were going through the same thing and in a weird way, it helped.

 

But she didn’t have that anymore.

 

And today, all she wanted to do was crawl into her bed and never come out. But Finn insisted they go out. They’d almost been dating for a month, and he already had plans the night that it would mark exactly a month, so he wanted to celebrate now. She hadn't told him about her father and she wasn't really planning to, either. She wasn't the kind to talk about her feelings and she really did not want to talk about her dad.

 

'Clarke?' Her thoughts were interrupted as she once again met Finn’s eyes. 'You've been out of it all night, are you okay?'

 

'Yeah,' she forced a smile. 'Just not feeling well, is all.' Concern washed over his face and Clarke immediately regretted her answer.

 

'What is it? Headaches, nausea? What do you need, how can I help?' He was being sweet, which was one of the things she loved most about him, but right now she just wanted to be alone.

 

'Do you mind if we call it a night? I'm sorry, I don't want to ruin our night but I just think it might be better if I go to bed early...'

 

'No, of course! Come on, let's go.'

 

*

 

'Are you sure you don't want me to come up?' Finn asked for about the millionth time since he pulled up in front of building.

 

'Yes, I'm sure. Thank you for offering, though.' She pecked him on the lips and opened the car door.

 

'I'll call you. Goodnight, Princess.' Finn met Bellamy a while back and he had not made the best impression on him. After their first encounter Clarke figured Finn was a bit jealous because he started calling her 'Princess' as well. And she didn't really know how to explain it, but it felt wrong. 'Princess' was Bellamy's thing, not Finn's.

 

She sighed once before she dragged herself up the stairs—up to the third floor. It had never seemed a longer trip than it did tonight and she was nearly out of breath when she finally reached her floor.

 

She grabbed her keys from her purse and set the last few steps to her apartment door, resting her head against the cold surface as she unlocked it.

 

'You're home early. Was the company of your prince not to your liking?' Bellamy teased.

 

‘It was fine.’ Without sparing him a second glance, she walked inside.

 

She had barely closed the door when Bellamy knocked on her door. At this rate, she was never going to reach her bed. So she yelled ' _go away'_ as she tossed her purse on the couch. She heard him murmur something like _'I don't think so'_ before he carried on knocking.

 

'Fuck.' She murmured. She clenched her teeth and stalked towards to door, quickly opening it. 'What d--' She was in the middle of asking him what the hell he wanted, when he interrupted her, a strange look- was that what worry looked like- on his face.

 

'What's wrong?'

 

'Nothing. I'm just tired and I want to go to bed.' She could see that he wanted to ask more questions, and she was surprised how easy it had become for her to read him. It was a real challenge at first, when he refused to let her in. But over the few months she’s known him, he’d really opened up. It wasn’t as hard anymore to know what he was thinking.

 

For him, it had always been easy. Clarke wasn't sure if she was just an open book and bad at hiding her feelings, or if Bellamy was just that good at reading people-- maybe it was both-- but he had always been able to read her perfectly. And Clarke hated it. She liked to hide her feelings from time to time, and that wasn't exactly possible with Bellamy around.

 

Even now, she could see that he knew there was more going on than 'just tired', but he knew her well enough to know when to stop digging and she was thankful for that. He simply nodded and took a small step back. 

 

'I'll be right on the other side of the wall if you need me.' She smiled as a silent thank you and watched him as he disappeared into his own apartment. She sighed and went back into hers as well.

 

A drink. That was what she needed. A big, _big_ glass of red wine before she went to bed.

 

*

 

But falling asleep was easier said than done. The second Clarke closed her eyes, she saw her dad's lifeless body in the alley behind her house. So instead, all she did was stare at the ceiling. She had no idea what time it was now (she was too scared to look), but she was certain it had been at least two hours. On a regular day, she would probably still be out with Finn, giving in to her fourth drink, promising it would be her last, but knowing it wouldn't be. 

 

'Fuck.' She half-yelled. This night was going to be a long one. Almost immediately her phone rang. She frowned as she picked it up.

 

'I thought you said you were tired.' Bellamy's voice echoed through her phone.

 

'I am.' She answered, honestly.

 

'Then why aren't you asleep?'

 

'I could ask you the same question.' 

 

'Yeah, but I asked first.' Clarke rolled her eyes. 

 

'Nightmares.' Bellamy hummed.

 

'My mom used to call them demons. Or caused by them, anyway. Octavia used to have real bad nightmares, and my mom used to tell her the same thing, over and over. 'Slay your demons when you're awake, they won't be here to catch you when you sleep.' It worked for me when I got them.'

 

'What were your nightmares about?'

 

'A lot of shit. Mostly Octavia, though.' Clarke could hear in his voice how much he missed her. 'My mom died when she was still young. Too young to ever lose your parent. But I was a mess, I was barely eighteen and by no way ready to take on the responsibility to take care of both her and me. She won't say it but I know she resented me for it. She ended up in foster care, had problems with every home she went to until I got my shit together.'

 

'Bellamy…' 

 

'I should've taken care of her. My sister, my responsibility.'

 

'No. Screw that.' She said, almost angry at the thought of an eighteen year old Bellamy carrying that guilt. 'You were a kid. You didn't deserve to lose your mom at that age but you sure as hell didn't deserve that burden either.'

 

'My sister is not a burden, Clarke.' The fact that Bellamy used her name proved she was heading for dangerous territory and that she should tread carefully. 

 

'That's not what I meant and you know it. Bellamy, you weren't ready to take care of yourself at that age, let alone take care of someone else as well. At least you _got_ your shit together. I know plenty of people who don't have their shit together yet. Myself included.'

 

'Aww, has the Princess gone a little off the rails?' He teased. Good to see that Bellamy returned.

 

'Honey, I'm so far gone I wouldn't even know which direction the rails is. I mean, I live in an apartment in Chicago which I pay for with my trust fund, even though I literally ran to Chicago to get away from the same person that set up that trust fund. I have about a billion problems in my life and instead of facing them head on, I run away and get myself into more trouble.'

 

'Who did you run from?'

 

'My mom.'

 

'What problems are you running from?'

 

'Are you really going to play my shrink?'

 

'It's 2AM, I have to do something to entertain myself.' Despite her sorrows, Clarke smiled.

 

'I prefer not to. Maybe some other time, okay?'

 

'Sure. But before that happens, can I ask you for some advice?'

 

'You want the advice of a screw up?' 

 

'Yeah.' The fact that Bellamy didn't take that opportunity to make fun of her spoke volumes. 

 

'Shoot.'

 

'Octavia is coming home. Well- she's coming to _my_ home, I doubt she'd ever describe it as hers. She called last week, told me she regrets leaving me as hotheaded as she did, and asked if I was okay with her dropping by soon. But I don't—I want this to work, but I've screwed up everything in my life so far. I don't want to lose her again.' Clarke’s heart ached for him.

 

'Then tell her that. She made the first move by calling. She _wants_ to see you. She obviously wants this to work just as much as you do, so just talk to her. You'll do fine. From what I've heard you love her very much and I'm sure she appreciates it.'

 

'But what if I do mess it up? I don't think I can live with her hating me forever.'

 

'Bellamy, as much as I'm sure you hate to hear it, you're not as big a screw up as you want everyone to believe. You love your sister. She loves you. She's coming to visit and you're going to sit down and catch up. Honestly, even I can't screw that up. Catching up is the easy part. Do you know when she's coming?'

 

'No, she said she would call when she knew the exact date.' Clarke's eyelids were getting heavier by the second, and she really wanted to try to go to sleep again. That, and she didn't want to bother Bellamy any longer. 'Thank you, Clarke.'

 

'I'm the one who should be thankful. It’s the middle of the night and you’re up and talking to me because I couldn’t sleep.'

 

'Don't make it a habit, okay? I need my beauty sleep.'

 

*

 

She woke up five hours later. Clarke was pleasantly surprised when she saw what time it was, she'd gotten way more sleep than she thought she would.

 

_Thanks to Bellamy._

 

She was going to thank him with breakfast, like the good old days. She still had the spare key so she jumped out of bed, not bothering changing out of her PJ's. It was only Bellamy, after all.

 

She entered his apartment and went into his kitchen as quietly as she could. She didn't want to wake him, especially not after how long she kept him up last night. She decided bacon and eggs would be greatly appreciated by him. When the egg was frying she went back to her place to get some orange juice since Bellamy was all out, and Clarke was craving some orange juice. Other than the orange juice, Bellamy had all the necessities. She set the table for two before turning her attention back to the bacon.

 

'Cute PJ's.' Bellamy startled her.

 

'I was almost afraid I had to serve you breakfast in bed.'

 

'After last time, that’s probably not the best idea.' He laughed as he sat down. 'What's the occasion, though?'

 

'Just a thank you for last night.' She replied as she placed the pan on the table.

 

'I thought you already said thanks. You really shouldn't have.'

 

'This was the least I could do.' 

 

'You know I'm always here for you, right?' Her lips curved into a small smile as she nodded. 'Good. Now, are you going to tell me why you were so upset last night or are you going to keep pretending you were just tired?'

 

She opened her mouth to respond, but closed it again when she realized she didn't know what to tell him. Did she want him to know?

 

'It's fine, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to.' He took a bite and moaned. 'God, I don't appreciate good breakfast food enough. From now on, I will decline every 'thank you' from you that is not served as breakfast food.' She chuckled.

 

The way to a man's heart really was through his stomach.

 

'So how's school going?' 

 

'Do not get me started, seriously, I don't know what I was thinking when I signed up for premed.'

 

'That bad?'

 

'It's never even been my passion. I've always found it interesting, sure, but-- I don't know how to explain it, really. I just feel like you should love what you do and vice versa, but I've never really loved medicine that way?'

 

'Then why sign up for it?'

 

'My mom always expected me to follow in her footsteps.'

 

'You know, you never talk about your family or your home town.'

 

'There's not much to say. My dad is dead, my mom and I are not on speaking terms... the only friend I ever really had back home is Wells. I've told you about him, right?'

 

'A little, yeah. I think I've seen him around a few times.'

 

'Well, other than him there's not really anything for me in Arkadia.'

 

'Clarke, you have a mother there. Just because you're having a difference of opinions doesn't mean--'

 

'You don't know what you're talking about, Bellamy.'

 

'I'm just saying, at least your mom is alive.'

 

'It's complicated.’ She said, hoping he’d drop it. He stared at her for a second, his demeanor slowly getting softer as he nodded.

 

'Okay.' A breath she didn't know she was holding escaped her. 'So, if being a doctor isn't your passion, what is?'

 

'I honestly don’t know. I like art, but I don’t- I don’t think that I could every do that as a profession.'

 

'You any good?'

 

'I wouldn't say I'm the new Van Gogh, if that's what you're asking, but I've been told I'm pretty good. But then again, I've only ever showed them to friends and family and they're kind of obligated to tell me they're amazing.'

 

'You can show them to me, I'll be brutally honest.' He said with a wink.

 

'Maybe.' She had never liked showing other people her work, it was like her diary, capturing moments she didn't like to share. But perhaps she had to get used to that if she wanted to pursue it. 'So--' She wanted to ask about how school was going for him, but with wide eyes he interrupted her.

 

'Shit, shit, shit. Is that the time? I'm gonna be late for work.'

 

'Go! Go, I'll clean this up. Go make some money.'

 

'Thank you.' He said as he basically sprinted into his bedroom. 'Hey, you up to hang out tonight?' He shouted.

 

'I wish I could, but I have plans already.'

 

'Ever since you started seeing Prince Charming I've seen less and less of you.' Clarke sighed, because he was right. She was hanging out less with Bellamy, but it wasn't on purpose. She just had more people to share her time with.

 

'While that might be true, my plans tonight aren't with Finn.'

 

'You're cheating on both of us? With who?' He asked as he came back into the living room, throwing a shirt over his head. Clarke caught a glimpse of his abs and she bit her lip. Why did he have to look so damn good?

 

'I have a hot Skype date with Wells.' She wiggled her eyebrows.

 

'Lucky bastard.' He winked as he hurried out the door.

 

*

 

Clarke was positively in love with her life at the moment. February was coming to an end, which meant winter was coming to an end as well, but Clarke didn’t mind. She was ready for the sun to shine again. She spoke to Wells at least twice a week, and most of all: she had an amazing boyfriend. Her and Finn have been dating for precisely two months today, and she’d fallen in love with him somewhere at the end of month one. Clarke had never believed in falling in love that quickly, but after a while she thought that maybe Bellamy had a point, calling Finn ‘Prince Charming’.

 

He had been very patient with her over the past months, and he never pushed her into anything. He respected her too much for that, and Clarke loved that about him. Especially with her dad, he never once expected to hear an explanation. 

 

Which is why she thought today would be the perfect day to thank him for all of this. She smiled at her own reflection in the elevator. She was wearing her long trench coat with absolutely nothing but black laced lingerie beneath it. She was going to surprise him at home. He wouldn't be home just yet, so she had enough time to mentally prepare herself for when he did come home from work.

 

The landlord agreed to lend her the spare key, Clarke has been around, coming to his apartment many times, so she knew Kim and more importantly: Kim knew her. So getting her to lend her the key wasn't very difficult.

 

She silently entered the apartment, dropping the coat on the couch on her way to the apartment. She stopped when she crossed a mirror.

 

'You can do this, Clarke.' She whispered to herself. She'd never done anything like this before, Clarke wasn't the spontaneous type and she never had a relationship that lasted this long before. 

 

She was barely lying on the bed for ten seconds when she heard the door open and close. It knocked all breath out of her. She was more nervous than she thought she was, she realized.

 

Which was when she heard someone laugh.

 

A female someone.

 

She got off the bed and tiptoed to the door so she could peek through the opening and her heart dropped at the sight.

 

Finn, kissing another girl. 

 

He didn't seem to notice anything around him, far too busy with his tongue down the girl's throat. She took a deep breath before taking a big stride forward, clearing her throat. Finn visibly tensed, breaking the kiss. His eyes locked hers when he finally opened them.

 

'Clarke...' 

 

'Surprise _, honey'_ She folded her arms over her chest, not caring about how exposed she looked. 'Happy two month anniversary.' Her eyes landed on the girl and she staggered backwards.

 

'Raven?' All sorts of emotions were coursing through her, surprise, anger, sadness. And she wasn't sure which she should act on, but the brunette replied before she could act on any of them.

 

'Two month, _what_?' Her voice broke. ‘I thought you said you wanted to try this long distance shit.' That hit Clarke really hard in the face.

 

'Wait...' She stammered. 'You... I- So you're not cheating on me with her, but-' She swallowed the lump in her throat, 'You're cheating on her with me?' The lump disappeared, but her blood began to boil. How dare he make her the other woman. She stalked past him and grabbed her coat, quickly throwing it on and closing it around her chest.

 

'Wait! Clarke. Please, I can explain.' He said hurriedly.

 

'No. Fuck you.' She stabbed a finger at his chest. 'You don't deserve to talk to me, ever again. So don't.' She turned around and opened the door, feeling his eyes on her. Anger got the better of her when she said, 'And one more thing,' before she turned around and crushed her fist against his nose. Pain immediately shot through her hand and up her spine, but the immense feeling of satisfaction conquered the pain.

 

'Go fuck yourself.'

 

*

 

When she returned home her hand was hurting like a bitch and she was all out of ice. She'd held it under cold water for a good five minutes, but she really wanted to ice it. So she ran into Bellamy's apartment, grabbed some ice and stalked back into her own apartment. Bellamy would be home any second, and she really didn't feel like explaining this one. She just wanted to be alone, and be angry.

 

She quickly threw on a sweater, not bothering to throw on pants. That was way too much trouble with an icepack on her hand. 

 

An hour later, she was settled on the couch, watching Brooklyn Nine Nine to make herself feel better. She only had two more episodes to watch until the season finale of the first season when someone knocked on her door.

 

'Go away!' She yelled. Whoever it was could shove it.

 

'Okay, but I'm keeping your mail!' Bellamy yelled back. ‘Never mind, I don't want your bills. I'm leaving it here for you. Feel better.'

 

She waited until she heard the door next door close before she got up to get her mail. She would have to apologize to Bellamy later, but at least he got the hint, which was more than she expected from him.

 

She opened the door to find the devil himself holding her mail in his hand with his eyebrows perked. 'You wanna tell me what's going on?' Spoke too soon. She clenched her teeth and she snatched her mail from his hands. 

 

'No. Go away.' But his attention wasn't focused on her anymore. He was staring at her hand.

 

'What the hell happened to you?' He demanded to know.

 

'None of your damn business. Leave me alone, Bellamy.' She slammed the door in his face and returned to her previous position on the couch.

 

She barely finished the last episode of the first season (God, how much she wanted Jake and Amy to happen 'romantic styles') when another knock rung through her apartment. She got up, blanket and all, and went to open the door.

 

When she opened it, she found Bellamy with a box of ice cream and a small smile on his face. ‘I come in peace.' Despite everything, she smiled, and she opened the door further to let him in.

 

'I sucker punched Finn.' She confessed when she had her first bite of ice cream. Ice cream was her weakness. His tongue darted out of his mouth and he bit his lip in a serious attempt to keep from smiling.

 

'Not that I'm complaining, but why would you do that?' He asked, before shoving another spoon full of cookie dough ice cream into his mouth.

 

'Turns out… I'm the other woman' She confessed with a humorless laugh. Bellamy's jaw locked, the same way it always did when he got pissed.

 

'I'm gonna kill him.'

 

'No. You're not. I already punched him, and I'm perfectly capable of fighting my own battles.'

 

'I know that, but I _really_ want to punch him.'

 

'Don't. Please.' He seemed to think it over before running a hand through his hair with a sigh.

 

'You know I can't say no to you.'

 

*

 

She didn't feel like working tonight, so she called Wick. He was determined to find out what was wrong, but Clarke wasn't set on explaining what exactly happened. So she brushed him off with a 'I'd rather be on the other side of the bar tonight.' He laughed at that and told her it was fine, it wasn't looking like a promising night, anyway.

 

When she turned up at Dropship later that night, she found Harper behind the bar. The first two shots were gone before Clarke could blink. She had to get her mind of Finn and Raven, and Finn and her. She had to close that chapter, but not before she was drunk. She had spent three months of her life, never knowing that Finn had a relationship with another girl, for probably way longer than three months. 

 

Clarke had barely downed the third shot, when Harper started inquiring what was going on with her. Deciding she couldn't run from telling the tale forever, she told her that Finn was cheating on the brunette that worked here for a while a few months ago. With her. Harper cursed as she poured her another glass.

 

'This is the last one on the house' She said with a wink. Wick was a firm believer of no more than one free drink a night, and Clarke had already had four. She didn't want to give Harper any trouble with Wick.

 

She felt the alcohol getting to her head and she closed her eyes at the feeling of it, savoring it. She needed this. To let go. To not worry about the consequences for _one_ night. 

 

A few guys came, and soon went after Clarke got what she wanted from them: a free drink. She wasn't here for a hookup, she was here to get free drinks and be miserable. One guy made a problem of her only wanting the drink, not him, like she owed him something after he bought that drink for her.  Safe to say, she and Harper put him in his place.

 

Harper stopped drinking with her soon after, she ended up taking a break with Miller taking her place. He wasn't as much fun as Harper, for one he refused to give her free drinks and he was reluctant to give her a drink at all. But he did end up giving her a beer or two, and that was all Clarke really cared about. 

 

She asked him for another one when he raised his eyebrows. 'Don't you think you've had enough, Clarke?' Clarke rolled her eyes at him. 'No, I'm serious, what's up with you? I've never seen you like this before.'

 

'Well, sue me.' She snapped. 'Nobody's happy all the time, and I most certainly am not happy all the time. I just need to blow off some steam, I'll be back to my boring, more responsible, usual self tomorrow.' 

 

'Are you okay?'

 

'I will be if you get me that drink.' Her words were slurred, and Clarke could see the doubt in Miller's eyes, but he went and got it anyway.

 

It wasn't until another guy offered her a drink, after Miller had already switched back with Harper, that he stopped her. 'I think it's time for you to call it a night.' Miller said, wrapping his arm around her waist as he lifted her to her feet.

 

Clarke groaned and stumbled against him. 'Come on, I'm taking you home.' 

He drove her home in a truck, which Clarke couldn't wrap her head around because she was sure Miller didn't own a truck, or any car for that matter. 

 

They arrived at her apartment ten minutes later (it took Miller a lot longer to drag her up those stairs than he cared to admit), and he walked her to a door, like the gentleman he was. He waited until she was safely inside until he turned and left.

 

Clarke had barely made it to the couch when she dropped. She groaned, taking off her heels, as she rolled around to find a more comfortable position to sleep in.

 

Unfortunately, her couch wasn't as big as her bed.

 

So she rolled right off of it, onto the floor.

 

And she didn't even have the chance to get a good rebound. What a waste of a night.  _So you haven't thought about it?_ His words echoed through her head. She tried to forget them, _God, how she tried,_ but it seemed they were stuck there.

 

She regained her balance and got back up her feet. _Your legs around my waist..._ Why did he even have to say that? It was totally unnecessary, and uncalled for. They were having pizza for heaven's sake. _God, she was hungry_. But more so for some action than for actual food.

 

The voice in her head chanted not to, but Clarke didn't listen and before she knew it, she was fumbling with the lock on Bellamy's door, trying to get the key in. She still had one. Bellamy never asked for it back, and she wasn't going to lie, it came in handy sometimes. 

 

When she finally got the door, she went straight for the bedroom, sure he would be sleeping by now. She tripped over her own feet twice before she reached the bedroom door, and she cursed at herself loudly.

 

The bed was empty, however, but Clarke's eyelids were heavy, and there was no way she’d make it back to her own bed. The last thing she recalled before it all went dark, was the smell of his cologne surrounding her.

 

*

 

When she woke up the next morning, she felt like actual shit. Her head was thumping like a maniac and it was way too light in her bedroom.

 

Or- someone else's bedroom. 

 

She groaned, and right at that second the door opened and Bellamy walked in with a glass of water in one hand, and an Advil in the other. 

 

'Oh, you're up. I was just gonna leave this here for you.' He handed her the water and she took it from him, grateful for his care.

 

'What happened last night?' She remembered bits, drinking with Harper, Miller taking her home, but she didn't remember how she ended up here.

 

'Your guess is as good as mine, you were fast asleep in my bed when I came here.'

 

'Strange.' She sat further up in his bed, folding her feet under her knees as Bellamy took a spot next to her.

 

'Yeah. Listen, Clarke...' He began and Clarke's heart skipped a beat at his tone. 'I need my key back.’

 

'Oh.' She didn't think it was possible, but she felt even worse after he had said it.

 

'I mean, I love having you here, obviously, but I just—I need it back.'

 

'It's fine, don't worry. It's your apartment, it's your key.' She agreed. Bellamy looked at her for a second before bursting out with laughter.

 

'You look like I'm breaking up with you.'

 

'Well it kind of feels like it?' She replied honestly.

 

'Shit. Sorry. I just- I thought I could just ask it back.' Clarke raised her eyebrows, urging him to continue. 'Octavia called. She's coming next week and since the rental agreement says I'm not allowed to make more keys... I need yours back to give to O.' 

 

She pursed her lips and flicked his shoulder. 'Dude! She’s coming home?’

 

'Yeah.' He smiled ear to ear, and a smile instantly formed on Clarke’s face as well.

 

‘You didn’t have to give me a heart attack, though.’ Bellamy scratched the back of his head, still smiling. 'You're gonna have to make that up to me. I don't know how yet, but I'm gonna make you suffer.'

 

'Wouldn't have it any other way, Princess.' 

 

'Anyway, I should go, you probably have better things to do than entertain the girl in your bed.' Her eyes widened as soon as the words left her mouth. 'I mean- not like a _girl_ in your _bed_. I just mean, I'm _literally_ a _girl_ in your _bed_. Please stop me.' 

 

Bellamy just smiled at her. 'You're cute. But...' His eyes fell to the floor as he scratched the back of his head. 'You might not want to go out anytime soon.'

 

'Excuse me?'

 

'It's just... Finn is at your apartment.'

 

'What?' 

 

'He's been banging on your door like a crazy person for the past fifteen minutes.' Clarke's eyes grew wide. What the hell? Did he miss the part where she sucker punched him in the face, yelling at him to fuck off? 'I can tell him to leave, if you want, but I was afraid that would only add fuel to the fire.'

 

'Yeah, don't do that. I mean, he has to leave at some point right? If it's okay that I stay here until then.'

 

'You think I'm gonna throw you to the wolves like that? Damn, Griffin. I'm not _that_ cruel.' Clarke laughed, but it was a pain to laugh with a hangover so she quickly stopped. 'You can stay for as long as you like. Just close the door on your way out.'

 

'When do you have to leave?'

 

'Not for another two hours.'

 

'What time is it?'

 

'It's almost 10.' She promised Wells she would FaceTime him around 10.30, but she didn't have her phone here. 

 

'Can I borrow your laptop later? I promised Wells I would call today, but I’m pretty sure my phone is at my place.'

 

Clarke easily logged into her Skype account and sent Wells a message that she couldn't reach her phone so it had to be over Skype. He didn't mind. He was pretty surprised to hear that Bellamy and Clarke were growing so close. Clarke couldn't blame him. She didn’t really talk about Bellamy a lot, sometimes, maybe, but not to the point where Wells would know that they’d grown into close friends.

 

To anyone who didn’t know Wells, he didn’t seem that surprised. He was kind to Bellamy, and Bellamy was kind to Wells. They seemed to really hit it off, Clarke even felt like she was third wheeling them at some point. They were so busy exchanging ‘Crazy Clarke’-stories that they’d almost forgotten Clarke was actually there.

 

Finn was gone when Bellamy went off to work, and Clarke took the opportunity to go back to her place and rinse away everything in the shower. All the memories she made with Finn, all the hugs, all the kisses, the touches, every smile she ever gave him. She wished it were that easy, but she knew it wasn't.

 

*

 

The next weeks flew by faster than Clarke could ever imagine. Bellamy had been incredibly nervous about Octavia coming, but Clarke assured him he'd be fine. And he was. Octavia dropped by the exact date Bellamy had expected her to. Clarke wasn't around to see it, but from what she could gather at the Dropship later that night, if there was one thing Bellamy shouldn't have worried about, it was things being awkward.

 

Octavia was lovely, a little rebellious perhaps, but she was nice. She really hit it off with every single one of Bellamy's friends, except for Clarke. It wasn't that she didn't like Octavia, because she did seem nice, she did act lovely, but a small part of Clarke resented her for leaving Bellamy the way she did. 

 

Bellamy didn't seem to mind at all, the past was forgotten, and he was just happy she was home. But she missed her friend, she missed hanging out with him. Octavia was always around him and she didn’t want to be insensitive, so she didn’t say anything but she missed just hanging out and talking, because she had a lot to tell him.

 

Raven sought her out at the bar, on one of her nights off. She came waving a white flag, she only wanted to talk. Raven was nice, amazing, actually, and Clarke hated Finn even more for going out with her when he had someone like Raven.  Raven was beautiful, funny, and a genius, from what Clarke could gather, and she deserved so much more than what Finn did to her. 

 

Finn and her grew up together, Raven told her, he was the only family she had and he was always there for her. She also didn't hate Finn, she explained, something Clarke couldn't understand but she envied Raven's compassion. She felt so strongly for Finn, and she was so, so grateful for everything he had done for her. She was upset with him, and angry at him, but she could never hate him.

 

She wasn't even sure if she could let him go completely, which was when Clarke deemed it time for shots.

 

They drank to silver linings, because Finn was a dick, but at least something good had come from their situation; they'd become friends.

 

When Clarke finally spoke to Bellamy again a week after that, and she told him all about Raven, who had quickly become one of her closest friends. Bellamy was a little more than surprised when he learned that it was Finn's ex-girlfriend Raven, who Clarke wanted to adopt into the gang. 

 

She explained their situation to him, and put him in his place after that, because 'It's the 21st century, we're both awesome. Why the hell wouldn't we be friends?'

 

Bellamy couldn't argue with that.

 

It was a Friday night when they were all back together again. Bellamy, Clarke, Raven, Octavia, Monty and Miller. Octavia had proved herself to Clarke, she wasn't blind to Clarke's skeptical glances in her direction, so she'd talked to Clarke. She also thanked her for being a good enough friend to Bellamy to actually doubt her, even if there wasn't any reason to.

 

They were two shots in when Raven came up to her, pointing to Monty and Miller, who were laughing about something Miller had said, and said:

 

'I'll be damned if those two aren't the cutest couple ever.' Clarke knew that Monty had a crush on Miller. He didn’t say it with too many words, but the way his eyes lit up every time someone said his name spoke volumes.

 

'They're not dating, though.'

 

'They should be.' Raven smirked, raised an eyebrow, and took another sip of her beer. Clarke's lips curved into a well-knowing smirk, before she called over Bellamy.

 

'What's up?' He asked as he joined the two girls.

 

'Look at those two and tell me what you see.' Clarke said, nudging her head in Monty and Miller's direction.

 

'I don't know? I see two guys drinking a few beers and having fun.'

 

'You're useless, you know that?'

 

'I'm sure you're right, but why?'

 

'Those two dig each other, and they need a nudge in the right direction, that's why.' Raven answered for Clarke.

 

'Yeah, so we're going to need your help.'

 

Their small nudge ended up being more like a violent shove, but it was worth it. They found out exactly what they already knew, but needed to confirm: Monty and Miller liked each other. So Bellamy, Clarke and Raven turned one of their game nights into a surprise date night.

 

Monty and Miller didn’t like surprises.

 

But they did like each other.

 

They left, just the two of them, and announced they were dating five days later. Clarke, Bellamy and Raven had a celebratory drink afterwards, even though they knew Monty and Miller would have ended up together, with or without the nudge.

 

'I can't believe we pulled it off though.'

 

'Two more people in our group who are dating.' Bellamy said. _And almost another_ one, Clarke didn’t say. Raven had her eyes set on someone, and Clarke knew it, but she couldn't get it out of her who it was. Raven brushed her off, saying it was nothing, that it was way too soon after Finn, but Clarke encouraged her anyway. 'It might be nothing now, but it can always grow into something more later on.', Monty and Miller were dating, Jasper was dating a girl named Maya.

 

'And yet, you're still single.' Clarke teased him, nudging his shoulder with hers. Or his upper arm, seeing he was way taller than her.

 

'Last I checked, you were too.'

 

'I'm going to set you up with someone.' Bellamy groaned in protest. 'No, I've made up my mind, this is happening.'

 

'I'm not looking for a relationship, Clarke.'

 

'Then I'll find you someone to fuck.'

 

'Jesus, I've really ruined you, haven't I?' True, she didn't openly say stuff like that before she knew him, but it wasn't like she was innocent before she met him. Besides, he could be a bad influence all he wanted, so long as she enjoyed it, which she did.

 

'Beyond repair.' Clarke replied.

 

'Okay, bathroom break!' Raven yelled when she got back from getting more drinks, and she dragged Clarke with her. Clarke lost her balance three times, Raven was in a hurry, but she managed not to fall on her face. 'What the hell is going on between you and Bellamy?' She asked the second they were inside.

 

'What do you mean?'

 

'You guys are just so... married?' Clarke scoffed.

 

‘What the hell. No. We’re just friends.'

 

'Sweetie, friends don't like at each other like that.'

 

Clarke snorted. 'I think you've had a little too much to drink.' She tried to move away, but Raven stopped her.

 

'Why aren't you hitting it, though? He won't say no to you, I can guarantee that.'

 

'I'm not-' Clarke’s voice dropped to almost a whisper, 'I'm not going to sleep with him. He's my best friend, I'm not going to ruin that by sleeping with him.'

 

'Jesus, a quick fuck doesn't mean you'll get married, Clarke. It can just be some harmless fun.'

 

'Is that what you're having with your mystery man? _Just some harmless fun_?' Clarke shot back.

 

‘Fine, if you don't want to sleep with Bellamy, that's your loss, really.' She evaded the question and looked in the bathroom mirror, quickly reapplying her lipstick. 'He's great in bed.' She said with a wink, and walked back out, leaving a very, very confused Clarke behind.

 

Clarke went home after that, suddenly beat. Bellamy offered to go home with her, but she refused.

 

*

 

She wouldn't admit it, but she avoided Bellamy for four straight days after. Which didn't seem that many if she thought about it, but it felt like an eternity. Maybe it was because he was her neighbor, and because she could hear him from her own apartment, but it annoyed Clarke. A lot.

 

It was a Wednesday morning when he knocked on her door with her mail. 

 

'So are you going to let me in, or are you going to keep avoiding me for no reason?' Clarke stepped aside, too stubborn to admit, to herself or to him, that she was in fact avoiding him because what Raven had told her bothered her, so she let him in.

 

'I wasn't avoiding you, I've just been swamped with these assignments...' She lied easily. It wasn't a total lie, exams were coming up, and Clarke had no idea how she was going to pass these, but she only had time to worry about exams because she wasn't spending that time with Bellamy or her friends.

 

Clarke had decided to finish the year and then quit school, if only to prove to herself that she could do med school if she really wanted to.

 

'How about I ask you again and you tell me the truth?'

 

'My answer will be the same.'

 

'Fine, be that way.' Clarke could tell he was annoyed by her. 'I can't believe you're still following premed, though. You hate it there.'

 

'I know, but I want to pass this year.'

 

'Why? If you're going to quit anyway, might as well do it now. Save some money. And energy.' It would save a lot of energy...

 

'I just want to know if I can do it.'

 

'If I've learned anything in the months that I've known you, it's that you can literally do anything you set your mind to.'

 

'Thank you.' He gave a nod, but that was it. Clarke poured herself some orange juice, and as she closed the refrigerator again, she knew she had to ask what was really bothering her.

 

'Did you sleep with Raven?' She almost didn't recognize her own voice, that's how quiet she was. Bellamy looked up from his paper.

 

'Who told you that?' He didn't deny it.

 

'Raven.' Bellamy sighed. His eyes found the ground and he ran a hand through his hair.

 

'Look, it was before I even know who she was, alright? It was way before. I didn't even know her, it wasn't until you took her to the bar to meet everyone that I recognized her.' 

 

'When?'

 

‘I don’t know, like.. a week before Octavia came, maybe? Somewhere around then.' Around the same time she tried to throw herself at Bellamy.

 

She had come in second to Raven again.

 

She had been happy that Bellamy ended up being out all night that night, but now that she knew he was out with Raven, she liked it a lot less. Why? She had no idea.

 

'Why didn't you tell me when I introduced you two? 'Hey Clarke, we actually already know each other, because we slept together after Finn fucked both of you over.''

 

'I don't know, fuck, Clarke, is this what's been bothering you all week?'

 

'No. _Yes._ ' She averted her gaze away from him. 'I just don't get why you didn't tell me.'

 

'Why are you so upset over this? It's not like we're dating.' Bellamy continued on, something about it just being a one night stand, but Clarke wasn't focused on what he was saying anymore. It hit her, right then, when he said that, it hit her why it had bothered her so much that he had slept with Raven.

 

Because Raven wasn't her.

 

_She liked Bellamy Blake._

 

'You're right, I'm sorry, I'm just overreacting. I'm just... really stressed out with midterms, I guess I'm focusing my frustration on this.' Clarke lied through her teeth. 'I've got to run a few errands, you're welcome to stay, but please lock the door on your way out?' She threw on her coat, grabbed her keys and purse and went out the door, but not before throwing one last glance at Bellamy, who nodded at her. All the time she only had one thing running through her mind.

 

_She liked Bellamy Blake._

 

*

 

When exams were over, everyone celebrated at the bar. Except Raven, who was out with her mystery man. Bellamy was flirting with some blonde, and it angered Clarke even more. She downed three shots before stalking off to the bathroom to freshen up.

 

She was pathetic, she concluded.

 

She needed to get rid of him. She needed to get over him. Once she was back at the bar, a gorgeous brunette offered to buy her a drink. Clarke gladly accepted. For the first time since Clarke found out she liked Bellamy, it wasn't Bellamy's name that rung through her head. It was hers. _Lexa. Lexa. Lexa._

 

Lexa asked her if she wanted to get out of here, she did. They went back to her place.

 

Clarke actually had a pretty good time, so instead of getting dressed and leaving, she asked Lexa if she was feeling like joining her for breakfast.

 

*

 

Clarke spent less and less time with Bellamy, and more with Lexa instead. She wanted to give it an honest chance, and hanging out with Bellamy was sure to ruin that, which is why she didn't.

 

Bellamy didn't like Lexa, for whatever reason. Clarke wasn't even sure they had met, but Bellamy still didn't like Lexa. But Clarke did, so she didn't care what he thought.

 

But Clarke did care about Bellamy. She cared a lot. She really did want to give Lexa and her a shot, but she wasn't blind. She knew Bellamy played a role in their relationship, even though he was no part of it. Even though Clarke didn't really spend any time with him anymore. And Lexa noticed it too.

 

As much as Clarke wanted to make it work, it couldn't. They broke up two weeks later.

 

*

 

'Where's Octavia?' She asked when Bellamy opened the door for her the same day Clarke broke up with Lexa. She needed to talk to someone.

 

'Off to work.' Octavia worked at a small coffee shop, which she really enjoyed. It was a real change of scenery from riding her Harley Davidson all day to making foam art at a coffee shop, but she had welcomed it. That, and she really liked the customers. Specifically one of them, but Clarke doubted Bellamy knew about him. 'How's Lexa?' There was a bitterness in his voice she didn't recognize.

 

'We broke up.' His features softened, but only slightly.

 

'Why?'

_Because she's not you._

 

'We wanted different things.'

 

'Are you okay?'

 

'Yeah.' She was a little upset that she couldn't make it work, but mostly because it meant admitting that she couldn't get over Bellamy.

 

'Good, then I can be mad at you.'

 

'Excuse me?'

 

'You shut me out for two weeks because you had a girlfriend. I'm mad at you, but I can't be mad at you if you're not okay.' Clarke would laugh at his reasoning, if he wasn't so obviously upset with her.

 

'I'm sorry, Bellamy.'

 

'Why did you, though? I didn't realize we were the kind of people who dropped friends once they got a girlfriend.'

 

'I didn't… I just-' Clarke bit her lip, not sure how to explain to him that she had to do this. 'I just had to, okay?'

 

'No. Not okay. Why did you have to?'

 

'Just because.'

 

‘Jesus, can you maybe _not_ be vague for one fucking second?!’

 

'Fine! Because I was afraid that my feelings for you would get in the way.' She snapped and the silence that followed nearly killed her. ‘Is that clear enough for you?’

 

'What the hell are you talking about?' He finally asked, something in his tone bothered her.

 

'I realized why that thing with Raven bothered me so much.' She explained, quickly losing her patience with him. 'And I know how much you _hate_ relationships, so I figured I'd give myself a shot at actually being in one for a change.'

 

Terrified of his reaction, she stormed out before he could respond.

 

*

 

She told Raven everything that happened the night after. She had to tell someone, and she wasn't sure how to explain to Octavia that she's crushing on her brother. If it even still qualified as crushing.

 

Raven took her mind off it by finally telling her about her mystery man. His name was Roan, and he was buying Dropship from Wick. They met when Raven was helping Wick, stacking boxes, moving some things around, when Roan dropped by to give Wick an offer.

 

He was a walking contradiction, Raven explained. His eyes were soft, when they gazed at her, contrasting with the cutting edges of his words. But Raven liked it. She liked him. His lips were soft too, she confessed.

 

Clarke forgot all about her Bellamy problems, and focused on her friend instead.

 

Apparently they were getting more serious by the minute, and Raven wasn't sure if she was ready for that or not. They'd only been on two dates, but they had already slept together three times. All before they went on their first date, Raven assured her. She had meant for it to just be some harmless fun, like she had told Clarke to have with Bellamy, but he wanted more, and she'd be lying if she said she didn't want it either. Which is why she agreed to go on a date with him.

 

From the way she talked about him, Clarke could tell she liked him. _Really_ liked him. 

 

That same night Raven met Wells. Clarke missed him and wanted to call him, but Raven had already claimed a spot in her bed to sleep tonight, so she didn't really have another choice. Not that she minded, of course, she wanted Wells to know all her friends, and she wanted all her friends to know Wells, but sometimes it was nice to just have a conversation with him, just the two of them. Which is why she promised to call him the next night, to have a quiet night, just the two of them, to catch up.

 

Clarke texted Bellamy an apology for her outburst at two in the morning, with Raven sound asleep next to her. It was lame, and she knew it, but she wasn't sure if she could gather the courage to face him and say it to his face. She wasn't sure what he was thinking, which she mostly blamed him for, because he was so damn hard to read. She was mostly afraid that what she had said would damage their friendship, she didn't want to tell him to prevent exactly that, and she was terrified that it wouldn't be the same anymore.

 

_I’m sorry for overreacting._

 

But in the morning, when she looked at the time, there was one unread message from Bellamy. Her heart hammered in her chest as she tapped 'view'.

 

_I'm sorry for being a dick._

 

*

 

Everything went back to normal after that… Well, sort of. Clarke took a little step back from their relationship to figure out what she wanted, but her and Bellamy were fine. Bellamy gave her the space she wanted, and they never talked about what she’d said. Clarke wasn’t exactly sure if that’s what she wanted, but it was the way it was and she could live with it.

 

By the time Bellamy’s birthday came around, they were totally fine. Clarke had come to the conclusion that while, yes, she did like Bellamy, it was also a lot of confusion. The way they acted, having dinner together, starting the day together, plus they practically lived in two apartments, it was a little weird, which added to the confusion. She adored Bellamy, and she couldn’t wish the feelings away, but she damn well wouldn’t wait until they magically disappeared. She wasn’t going to distance herself from him any further. That certainly was no healthy way to cope with her feelings, that’d be just deceiving herself.

 

A few weeks later, Raven introduced a new member to the group: Gina, whom she knew from work. She was lovely and Clarke really enjoyed having another girl to back them up, since Octavia went on a road trip for two weeks with her crew. Bellamy was a little hesitant to let her go at first, but Octavia assured him she’d come back.

 

Clarke wasn’t blind. She noticed the glances Bellamy and Gina exchange, and she knew Bellamy was probably just trying to keep it on the downlow for her, to make sure she was comfortable, but it bothered her. And not because she was jealous—because she’s not jealous _at all—_ but because he was keeping it from her. Naturally, she confronted him about it. He stuttered at first, but with a sigh, he told her all about it.

 

He wasn’t sure how he felt at first, and he _was_ a little hesitant to talk to her about it, because he thought it’d be awkward. Clarke had scoffed, getting a little mad. Mostly at herself though, for thinking that her outburst hadn’t changed anything. For thinking that everything was still the way it used to be. It wasn’t. You can’t tell someone you’re into them and expect nothing to change.

 

Clarke knew he was just trying to be thoughtful, though, so she didn’t get mad at him. She assured him she was fine with it, and she wished him and Gina all the luck in the world.

 

They announced it to the group that weekend, and her heart ached, but Clarke smiled, anyway.

 

*

 

‘I’m telling you, Steve and Bucky are not _just_ friends. My gaydar has never been wrong before, and this is the gayest shit I’ve ever seen.’ Clarke explained to Bellamy. It was a Thursday afternoon and since they were both free they decided on having a movie night. One of the downsides of Bellamy dating Gina was that they lost their weekends together. Bellamy and Gina were pretty serious, but Bellamy was really happy. And despite the fact that it stung that it wasn’t Clarke who made him happy, she was glad. He deserved to be happy.

 

Today was the first day they were both free so it didn’t take Clarke long to claim her spot on his couch with _Captain America: Civil War_ on. She couldn’t understand how Bellamy didn’t see that it was _gay._ Steve was literally starting a war to protect the guy he loves. He should have seen all the signs by now, seeing as how Clarke made him watch _The Winter Soldier_ at least thirty times. She couldn’t help it. It was her favorite movie ever.

 

‘Whatever you say, Clarke.’ He shook his head, smiling. ‘You want another beer?’

 

‘Always.’ Bellamy rolled his eyes and got up to go to the kitchen. Clarke watched him as he did and sighed. Why did she have to make everything so complicated? Feelings suck.

 

Next to her, her phone lit up and started buzzing. Clarke frowned as she noticed the caller ID. Her mother never called. She hesitated, not wanting to talk to her mother but knowing that she couldn’t avoid it forever. And also knowing that it must be important if she were calling. She took a deep breath and raised the phone to her ear.

 

‘Hey..?’ She whispered.

 

‘ _Clarke’,_ her mother began, and Clarke almost winced at the panic in her voice. Her heart started racing immediately, thinking of everything that could be the reason for it. _‘I’m so glad you picked up.’_

‘What’s wrong, Mom?’ Her voice trembled, but she didn’t care.

 

‘ _It’s Wells.’_ Clarke could feel her heart drop and tears welled up in her eyes. _‘He’s in the hospital—He got shot, Clarke.’_

‘W-what? But… how? _When_?’

 

_‘I can’t go into the details right now, but I figured you’d want to know. It’s bad, Clarke. He’s in surgery right now, they’re not sure when he’ll get out.’_ Clarke winced.

 

‘You mean you’re not sure _if_ he’ll get out.’ She wasn’t even sure her mother could hear her, with how silent her voice was. But she recognized the way her mother was talking. It was her surgeon voice. She was trying to sugarcoat it, to give her hope where there wasn’t any.

 

_‘I have to go. I’m sorry, Clarke.’_ The line went dead, and Clarke was left staring at the wall. She wasn’t sure when she got up from the couch, but she’d always had the habit of pacing around when she got calls.

 

_Shot, shot, shot._

 

It kept repeating in her head.

 

_Shot, shot, shot._

She could almost see Wells lying somewhere, in the middle of the street, bleeding, calling out for help.

 

‘Clarke?’ Bellamy’s voice brought her back to the present time. ‘Hey, what’s wrong? Who was that on the phone?’

 

‘I—um. I have to go, I-I have to book a flight back home, I’m sorry Bell, I--‘ The lump in her throat got too big to continue talking and she let herself sink to her knees and she _wept._ For the first time since her father died she _wept._

 

‘Shit, Clarke.’ Bellamy sat down next to her, wrapped his arms around her and pulled her to his chest.

 

‘H-he got s-shot, Bellamy.’ She cried, ‘Someone shot him. He might _die._ ’

 

Bellamy whispered sweet nothings in her ear. ‘It’s gonna be fine, Clarke. He’s gonna be fine. Just breathe.’ Clarke tried to focus on his words, but it was too hard. _Wells could die._ Bellamy grabbed her cheek and forced her to look at him. ‘Clarke, look at me. Breathe with me, alright?’ He started taking deep, steady breaths, motioning her to follow him. She tried, did the best she could. She could feel her heart slowing down as she did.

 

‘We’ll figure it out, okay? Just focus on breathing.’ Clarke wiped her tears away and wrapped her arms around his neck, hugging him.

 

‘Thank you.’ She whispered when she let him go.

 

‘You don’t have to say thank you. Just tell me what you need, and I’ll get it done.’

 

*

 

Clarke left on the first flight out. Bellamy booked it for her while she packed her bag and he drove her straight to the airport. She texted her mother with the details about her flight so she could send someone to pick her up before turning her phone off and staring out the window. _Wells got shot._ That stupid, know-it-all, way too kind for his own good guy, who you should never play chess with because he’ll destroy you _got shot_.

 

There’s so much she still needed to tell him. So much he needed to know. And she didn’t even visit him yet, she kept making him come to her. Did he know that she would move heaven and earth for him?

 

‘Clarke?’ She got snapped out of it and looked over at Bellamy, ‘want to talk about it?’

 

‘I just- I need him, Bellamy. My whole life… there’s been Wells. I can’t live without him. I don’t _want to_.’ Her voice broke, and she shook her head. Bellamy grabbed her hand and she pulled her bottom lip between her teeth and looked at him.

 

‘He’s not gone yet.’

 

‘You should’ve heard my mom… it was like he was already dead.’

 

‘Don’t go there, Clarke. Not unless you’re absolutely certain you have to.’ She nodded absently, already thinking about what it would be like, living without him. No more Skyping, no more FaceTiming, no more bitching about Mayor Jaha and random visits whenever Wells needed to get away.

 

‘Are you sure you’re okay going alone?’ Clarke nodded softly.

 

‘I’ll be fine.’

 

‘Just—if you’re not… I don’t have anything important to do, anyway..’

 

‘Thank you, but you don’t have to drop everything for me.’

 

‘I want to, though.’

 

‘I know, and I love you for it. But honestly, I’ll be fine.’

 

He waited with her till her gate opened to say goodbye. He closed his arms around her and Clarke nuzzled her face into the crook of his neck, which had grown to be her favorite place in the world. ‘Call me when you land?’ He muttered into her hair and she nodded.

 

And then she let go.

 

*

 

Her mother picked her up from the airport, and safe to say it was awkward. She hadn’t seen her mother in over seven months. Still, all of the past seem to fall away when Clarke remembered why she was there. She hugged her mother, and though it did surprise her, Abby hugged her right back.

 

‘Wells just got out of surgery.’

 

‘Is he..?’ Clarke couldn’t utter the word. _Dead._

 

‘The surgery went great, Clarke. He pulled through. Now it’s a matter of waiting if he wakes up on his own, if his body can take it, but so far so good.’

 

‘Can I go see him?’

 

‘Absolutely, but I have to warn you, it’s not pretty.’

 

They went straight to the hospital and Clarke almost broke down when she saw him. He was hooked on the IV, tubes _everywhere_ and he looked like a corpse. But he was alive and that was all that mattered. She sat down in the chair next to his bed and grabbed his hand.

‘Hey big guy… you did it. I’m home.’ She couldn’t see clearly due to the tears, and her voice broke halfway through but she needed him to know she was there. That she was with him. ‘You just rest now, okay? You’re going to need your strength fighting this. But you can do this, you’re the strongest guy I know. You got this.’

 

When she looked up she saw her mother standing in the doorway, tears in her eyes. Clarke squeezed Wells hand one last time and went to her.

 

‘We should go, he needs his rest and so do you.’

 

Clarke spent most of her days with Wells, and slept at her mother’s house, in her old bedroom. It seemed like a lifetime ago when she lived there. So much had changed. She talked to Wells about everything. Everything he already knew or had yet to know, but in way more detail than necessary. She told him about how upset she was after their first fight, how ridiculous it was, about how jealous she was when he got a girlfriend and she got all the attention. How it made Clarke feel, how insecure she was to come in second.

 

She told him _everything_.

 

Even about Bellamy and how hopelessly in love she was with him. ‘But he’s with Gina now, and she’s good for him. I’m pretty sure she loves him.’

 

But no matter how much she talked, Wells didn’t wake up.

 

On day three the doctors started to worry. They talked to Jaha and Abby about the options, how much time he had left, when the chance of him waking up would be low enough to give up. That it was time to start worrying. Clarke trembled when she went in to see him the day after. She settled in her usual seat and grabbed his hand.

 

‘I love you, Wells. I know you hate it when I get sentimental, but I love you. And I know I’ve been talking your ears off this week, but I need you to know that _I’m here._ You’re not alone, Wells, and you never have been. _We’re all here._ You should see your dad right now, he looks almost worse than you do.’ She laughed softly. ‘He loves you so much, Wells. We all do and we can’t do this without you.’ She stopped, looking up in a desperate attempt to keep the tears at bay. ‘We need you. _I need you._ ’ She cried.

 

‘You cannot die, Wells. I swear to God. I can’t do this without you.’ Tears were flowing freely now but she didn’t care. All she cared about was Wells. ‘Please, don’t leave me.’ Wells shifted his hand and Clarke was sure she was dreaming when his eyes fluttered open.

 

‘I can’t believe-‘ He started weakly, ‘that I had to get shot to finally get you down here.’ Clarke laughed through the tears, running her thumb over the back of his hand.

 

‘And here I thought I was the dramatic one in this friendship.’ She wiped a tear away with her free hand. ‘How are you feeling?’

 

‘Like I got shot.’

 

‘Fair enough.’ She smiled, and saw Wells physically struggling to keep his eyes open. ‘Get some rest, okay? I’ll go get your dad.’

 

She stayed for another month. She waited until Wells was released from the hospital and safely settled at home with his dad to leave. Wells was going to have to start with physical exercise, and Jaha hired someone to stay with them in the manor.

 

Wells getting shot opened Jaha’s eyes and he promised, on his life, that this would be his last term. And if Wells needed him to, he would cut it short. But Wells didn’t want to ask that of him, which Clarke could understand. They needed to get used to each other again, needed to get used to being father and son and everything that came along with it. Wells had changed a lot during the years Jaha had been mayor, and Jaha hadn’t even seen half of it. They needed time, and Clarke refused to impose, so she booked a flight home.

 

‘I’ll be back later next month, I promise.’ She was careful to hug him goodbye. She’d already looked at the prices to book, but wasn’t exactly sure which dates would fit best in her schedule. Not that it mattered, she’d drop everything for Wells. But she wasn’t just coming back for Wells. Now that she’d seen and spoken her mother, there was a lot to talk about, and Clarke was finally willing to. She couldn’t stay mad forever.

 

‘Can’t wait. Have a safe trip, and say hi to Bellamy for me.’

 

‘I will. I love you.’

 

‘I love you, too, Clarke.’

 

*

 

She settled back in quickly, catching up on everything that had happened. The usual gossip about the regulars in Drop Ship, and the news from people in the gang. Not long after she returned Bellamy and Gina split up, out of nowhere. Nobody really knew what happened, everything seemed to be going fine but three months in they called it quits. Or, Gina called it quits and Bellamy refused to talk to anyone about it. And out of respect for him, Gina refused to as well.

 

Raven and Roan went steady, _finally_. And Raven decided to celebrate it, in a way that only Raven would. Music, booze, booze, and more booze. But quite honestly, Clarke preferred it that way. She had also invited Gina. Which made sense, because they were friends. Raven was friends with Gina before Gina had even met Bellamy, and Raven had warned him when they first started dating that she wouldn't just stop hanging out with Gina just because they were over. 

 

It seemed like a weird thing to say at the time, seeing they had just began dating, but it had been a fair warning. That didn't mean the awkwardness wasn't there when Gina showed up, though. In fact, even those who didn't know Bellamy and Gina used to be a thing could feel it. 

 

But they drank the awkwardness away and it disappeared somewhere after the second hour there. Still, Bellamy stayed as far away from Gina as he could, until the games started and he was forced to be in the same room as her.

 

He did, however, take every opportunity to get out of said room. He and Raven were getting refills for everyone when Clarke had to use the restroom. When she walked past the kitchen, she overheard a question Raven asked him.

 

'What happened between you and Gina?' Curiosity got the better of her, and she pressed her back against the wall to stay away from their sight. He hadn't told her anything except for the usual 'we're over' speech, but Clarke couldn't deduce what had happened from anything that he had said. She didn't know who broke it off, she didn't know if it was a mutual agreement or not. She didn't know anything.

 

'Nothing you need to know about.'

 

'Come on, Blake. Don't be such a little bitch.'

 

'I'm not being a little bitch. I just- She's your friend.'

 

'So are you. Come on, what happened?' It fell silent for a while and Clarke imagined Bellamy hesitating, thinking whether or not he should tell Raven.

 

'She was upset that I spent so much time worrying over Clarke, thought it went way beyond being worried for a friend and decided we needed a break. I thought otherwise and she replied with, and I quote, 'I'm falling in love with someone who's head over heels for someone else, so yeah, I think we need a break.'' Clarke released a shaky breath she was holding. They were over because of her. She needed him and Gina broke up with him because of it.

 

'Are you? Head over heels for someone else, I mean?'

 

'I'm gonna bring the guys their beers. Don't tell Clarke, okay? I don't want to put this on her.' Clarke quickly returned to the living room, as fast and silently as she could, before feigning excitement and joining her team for the next round.

 

They won, but Clarke didn't feel like a winner at all.

 

*

 

She tried her best to let it go, it wasn't her place, she only knew it because she'd eavesdropped on his private conversation with Raven, but she couldn't let it go. She knew it was mostly because of the question Raven had asked, that he hadn't answered.

 

The feelings she harbored for Bellamy, that she had chained up somewhere in the darkest corner she could find a long time ago seemed to have broken back to the surface.

 

She had tried so hard to get over him, because she loved him. She loved their friendship more than the possibility of a relationship with him. But no matter what she tried, the feelings wouldn't go away. So instead of going about it in a healthy way, she bottled them up instead. She ignored the flutter in her stomach whenever he smiled at her, dimples and all. She ignored the lump in her throat whenever they laid curled up on his couch watching TV. She ignored all of it the best she could.

 

It came out totally unexpected two weeks later. She'd tried really hard, but somehow it managed to get past her lips during dinner. They'd just finished dessert when she asked, 'Why didn't you tell me Gina broke up with you because of me?'

 

Bellamy swallowed once. Twice. 'Raven told you?' He didn't sound angry at all, just surprised.

 

'I... accidentally overheard you guys at her party.' He rolled his eyes and got up.

 

'You mean you eavesdropped on our conversation.'

 

'Well you weren't giving me anything! A girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do.' She joked, knowing it wasn't funny.

 

'It was a private conversation, Clarke. You had no right.'

 

'I know, but I was worried.'

 

'I know you were.' He sighed.

 

'So why aren't you guys back together yet?'

 

'What are you talking about?'

 

'Well she thinks you're into me, all you have to do is tell her that's not the case, right?'

 

'It's not that simple.' Clarke frowned.

 

'Of course it is. It's just like that time Finn thought I was sleeping with you.'

 

'It's nothing like that.'

 

'Really? Why not?'

 

'Well, for one, I'm not a cheating scumbag.' He bit out.

 

'Other than that, why is it different?'

 

'It just is.'

 

‘Bell, come on, just tell me! _Why is it so different?’_

 

'Because that wasn't true!' Clarke froze at the words, and so did he. He was clearly afraid of her reaction, whereas Clarke wasn’t sure if she was dreaming or not.

 

Clarke blinked.

 

So did he.

 

'Shit, Clarke, I-' Clarke swallowed the rest of the sentence when she connected her mouth with his. His arms looped around her waist almost instantly, and his mouth moved against hers. Clarke's heart thundered in her chest, her hands delving in his curls, pulling him further down. Bellamy's teeth latched onto her bottom lip, nibbling softly. A wave of pleasure ran through her body and she gasped.

 

She still wasn't exactly sure if she was dreaming or not, but she didn't care. All she cared about was his lips on hers, her hands in his hair and his on her waist. She deepened the kiss, and her knees almost gave out the second their tongues collided. 

 

Bellamy let Clarke take the lead, but his hands moved from her waist over her ass, where he lingered, and then to her thighs. He lifted her up as if she weighed nothing and set her on the back of the couch, their lips never leaving.

 

When they finally did break apart, seconds, minutes-- who even knew -- later, they were both panting. Their hands still on the other, afraid they would slip right through each other’s fingers if they let go.

 

'I, um,' Clarke breathed against his lips, 'wow.' Bellamy's chest rumbled as he laughed. He leaned down and pecked her lips before leaning his forehead against hers.

 

'Wow yourself, Princess.' Clarke's smile slowly disappeared. Bellamy pulled back slightly, a frown forming on his beautiful face. 'What's wrong?'

 

'Where do we go from here? What... What does this mean?' As much as she liked the idea of being in a relationship with Bellamy, she wasn't quite sure if she wanted to risk their friendship on it.

 

'Correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm pretty sure it means you _like_ like me.' Clarke pursed her lips together tightly, trying to prevent herself from laughing but ultimately failing. He laughed with her before turning serious again. 'Clarke, I'm in if you are. I want...' His arms tightened around her waist, as he thought of a continuation for the sentence. 'This. You, me. I want this.' He said, sounding more determined than Clarke had ever heard him before. 

 

'I want this too, Bellamy. More than anything.' 

 

*

 

They told everyone two weeks later. They just got over the honeymoon phase, both of them called in sick and turned off everything that would link them to the outside world, and spent nearly two weeks inside Bellamy's apartment. 

 

Octavia was the first to be told, Bellamy insisted, and Clarke understood. Octavia was a close friend of hers as well, and she was Bellamy's sister. She had to know first. 

 

Bellamy invited her over for dinner on a Sunday night and spent all afternoon cooking.

 

Octavia wasn't an idiot. She knew something was up the moment she walked through the front door and Clarke was there too. Her eyebrows rose, but she didn't say anything. None of them did until all the food was gone and they kind of had to before it got weird.

 

'O, I- We, have something we'd like to run by you.'

 

'You make it sound like it's a business proposal.' Clarke said.

 

'I have to introduce the subject someway.' He shot back.

 

'What's this about?' Octavia interrupted.

 

'We're dating,' Bellamy said, 'and we wanted to tell you before everyone else.' Octavia smiled. 

 

'That's sweet of you, Bell. But honestly, it's not that surprising. I mean, as long as I've been back, Clarke's been here. It had to happen at some point.' Clarke smiled, not sure how to reply to that. ‘So what's going to happen now? How are you going to break it to the rest?'

 

Clarke shrugged and Bellamy answered, 'We haven't really talked about that yet.'

 

'Well, they'll all be happy for you guys, so I wouldn't worry about it too much.'

 

'Thanks, O.'

 

They told the rest that Friday night, when they were all together. Although, they didn't really _have_ to tell them. When they entered the bar, hand in hand, they could hear Ravens yells from far away.

 

' _Please_ tell me this is happening.' Clarke frowned a little at her overenthusiastic response, but nodded. 'Monty, you owe me twenty!' Clarke rolled her eyes, _well that explained it._

 

'Aw, shit.' Monty huffed and grabbed his wallet.

 

'You guys bet on this?' Bellamy asked, and Clarke had to urge to tell him that he was talking about Raven. She'd bet on anything. And she always won.

 

'I see it more as an investment.' Raven replied, smiling at the cash Monty handed her.

 

'Seriously, this is for real?' Miller let his arm fall from Monty's shoulder and straightened his back.

 

'Please, they've practically been dating for the past seven months.' 

 

Miller chuckled. 'That's true.'

 

'Raven, how much have you had to drink?' Clarke had to ask.

 

'Not that much,' She shrugged, 'I'm just excited about all of... this.' She waved between Clarke and Bellamy as she finished the sentence. 'Wick! It's time for a round on the house!' Raven yelled at Wick, who flipped her off, but turned around to grab some empty glasses, anyway.

 

'Jesus, Reyes, take it down a notch, or we might need a do-over of you announcing you and Roan were going steady.' 

 

'If that means free drinks, we can do it again as many times as you'd like.' Wick handed them their drinks and they all raised their glasses.

 

'To Bellamy and Clarke. It was about fucking time.' Miller said, and they all clinked glasses.

 

'To Bellamy and Clarke!'

 

*

 

'Can you believe I despised you the first weeks after I moved in?' Clarke settled on the couch, a pizza slice in her hand as she cuddled into Bellamy's side. They still had the Friday night movie night tradition and it had grown into Clarke's favorite time of the week. They'd been dating for a few months now, and Clarke had never been happier, and the happier she became, the funnier their past became.

 

Bellamy chuckled. 'Oh. I can believe it, alright. What was it that post-it note said? Something like 'You can have sex all you want just please do it quietly'?'

 

'Something along those lines, yeah.' They both laughed.

 

'If someone had told me you'd become this important to me, I would never have believed them.'

 

Bellamy shrugged. 'I would have.' Clarke leaned away from him to make sure he was serious.

 

'Really?'

 

'I knew it from the moment I read that post-it note with the little skulls as dots on the i's.' He replied, nothing in his face giving away if he were anything but serious. 'I knew I had to be friends with someone who took the insane amount of time to draw those ridiculous little things just to make a point.' He chuckled at the memory.

 

Clarke smiled, letting herself fall back into his arms. 'God, that seems like a lifetime ago.'

 

'I can't believe it took me until Gina broke up with me to realize that you were it for me all along.'

 

'I'm just glad I eavesdropped on you and Raven, otherwise we would probably still be pining after each other from afar.'

 

'I'm kind of glad you did, too.' He chuckled. 

 

'I love you.' She said then, and it felt like the most natural thing she'd ever said to him. It grew silent and for a second she thought he hadn't heard her. But then his arms tightened around her and his lips brushed the side of her head and he whispered in her ear.

 

'I love you, too.'

 

*

 

It wasn't until three years later that they got engaged. Bellamy had purchased a ring, and did not do a great job in hiding it - _'Really, Bell? The underwear drawer?'_ \- and he'd been acting slightly off. It didn't take much effort to connect the dots. 

 

But then he didn't ask. 

 

The weeks seemed to pass agonizingly slowly, and a month later, still nothing had happened. And the longer it took, the more Clarke doubted he actually would.

 

And it made her anxious as hell.

 

Bellamy made plans at a beautiful restaurant for their anniversary. They didn't really go on a first date or anything, and, as Raven would say, they’d been dating a long time before they actually started dating. So they decided to memorize the day they interacted for the first time. The day of the post-it note. Clarke got all dressed up, as did he, and she figured, 'maybe tonight'. When Clarke glanced over at him during dinner, he didn't look nearly as nervous as she felt. 

 

She chewed extra slowly, took small bites, thinking maybe he hid the ring in the food. But it wasn't there. They finished their food, Bellamy tipped the waiter generously and they went back on their way.

 

With his arm draped over her shoulder, they walked through the night back to their apartment. Bellamy praised the food, and Clarke agreed with whatever he said, not really listening.

 

'Oh, by the way,' Bellamy started as he unlocked the front door, 'Octavia invited us to have dinner with her and Lincoln next Sunday.'

 

'Sounds nice.' Bellamy shrugged off his jacket.

 

'You can choose a movie, I'll get the drinks.'

 

'I'm gonna get changed first.'

 

'Well, then I'll put in _the winter soldier_ for you.' Clarke pursed her lips. How could Bellamy know her so well and yet be oblivious to what's going on right now? Clarke changed into sweats and a t-shirt and headed back out. 'I also grabbed some snac-'

 

'Will you just ask me to marry you already?' She interrupted him. It wasn't until the words had left her mouth that she realized what just happened and her eyes widened, as did Bellamy's. Now that she started it, she might as well finish it. 'I found the ring, Bellamy. Weeks ago.' Bellamy was still staring at her, not saying anything, before his lips curled into a smile and he shook his head.

 

'I should have known that drawer was a terrible hiding spot.' 

 

'Do you have any idea how nervous I was for tonight? I thought you'd ask at the restaurant.’ Bellamy chuckled and motioned for her to sit down next to him.

 

'No wonder you ate so slowly, I usually have trouble keeping up with you and it took you an eternity tonight.' 

 

'Dude, I thought maybe you put it in my food, I was scared I'd swallow it.' Bellamy laughed.

 

'You have zero patience, you know that right?' Clarke nodded. 'But that's one of the things I love about you.'

 

'Truth time; did you chicken out?' Bellamy shook his head. 'Then why didn't you? Tonight was perfect.' _until I just ruined it_ , she didn't say.

 

'The night isn't over yet, Clarke.'

 

'I don't want a pity proposal.' Bellamy bit his lip, clearly trying to keep from laughing and Clarke hit his arm. 'I'm serious.'

 

'I know you are. And it's cute. Don't worry about it, okay? I'm gonna go to the bathroom, can you start the movie?' Clarke nodded and turned on the DVD player as Bellamy got up and headed for their room. Clarke turned her attention to the screen, which was all greasy.

 

'Bellamy? Something's wrong with the-' She shut up when the screen changed. Into Bellamy's face.

 

_Hey Clarke, happy fifth._ Clarke leaned back into the couch _. Jesus, you have no idea how awkward this is, I'm talking to a camera._ Clarke chuckled. _Anyway, tonight is five years since this,_ He held up a yellow post-it, and Clarke's eyes widened as she read the words she scribbled down angrily that night, _and I have a confession to make._

_I don’t really remember a time where I wasn't completely mesmerized by you. From the moment you left that post-it note, when you slapped me in the face pretending to be my pissed off fiancée, when you were yelling at me that you needed some space because you had feelings for me, and tonight. I've been planning this for over a year. I'm not kidding, you can ask Jasper when I knocked on his door at 3AM asking if it was possible to do this, which was somewhere around your birthday last year. And I know I've been an ass to you from time to time, I mean, take now for instance, I had Jasper burn this on the original_ the winter soldier _DVD, fully knowing how much you love this movie. You can yell at me about that later._

 

_Well, anyway, I just wanted to tell you how much I love you. Which is something I can't really put into words. So I think I'm going to leave that up to present me, in case I came up with something._ With a wink, the screen went black. Clarke's head shot up to present Bellamy - when had he come back into the room? - so fast she was sure she'd feel it later.

 

'I haven't actually found a way to tell you how much I love you.' He scratched the back of his neck with a shy smile. 'But you know I'm a firm believer of 'actions speak louder than words' and, if you'll let me, I'd like to spend the rest of my life showing you just how much I love you.' He kneeled down in front of her. 'And I promise this is not a pity proposal. It was killing me that I had to wait until now. Y'know, last year I thought _'oh fifth year anniversary is a great time!_ ' but it didn't cross my mind how difficult it would be not to ask you to marry me before that.' He rambled on, and Clarke smiled through the tears. 'Because you're it for me, Clarke. You're everything. And there were so many times I wanted to ask you, but I could hardly show this without it actually being our fifth anniversary. So I'm sorry you had to wait until now, but will you please marry me, anyway?' 

 

'Yes. Of course I will.' She hardly had the words out before his mouth latched over hers. They were both smiling, and the kiss was mostly teeth, but damn it, if that wasn't the best kiss she'd ever had.

 

'I couldn't just have kept my mouth shut for another hour.' Clarke rolled her eyes at herself as they broke apart.

 

'You could have, but it wouldn’t have been this much fun if you had.'

 


End file.
